Madeline
by Hacen
Summary: Lizzie and Matt return to Hilridge after leaving suddenly years before. FINISHED!
1. Out My Window

Madeline

A/N - A Few months ago I walked away from fan fiction, determined to focus solely on other projects that needed my attention. But I have to say that there is something about writing and receiving immediate reviews that kept calling me back. There is some magic twisted within the stories I thought I could do without, but now have spent days rereading and catching up on the updates I missed while away. So, I am reposting this story and taking a new look at my others. The Road To Where We Are still seems much more of a daunting task than I am prepared to handle at the moment, but who knows. . .Hope some of you enjoy this again, and that new readers stumble upon it.

Chapter One - Out My Window

Gordo

I was standing in the aisle of the grocery store staring at the back of the cereal box trying to figure out if I should go with my standard box of Peanut Butter Captain Crunch, or try something new for a really cool looking toy surprise. It was not an easy decision so I just gave up and bought them both. I laughed to myself as both boxes dropped into the cart thinking of how I could make huge decisions all day as a director, but when it came to choosing cereal I was always brought to a stand still. I was about to turn around and head back down the way I'd come in the aisle when I caught a glimpse of curly blonde hair walking past the other end of the aisle as my head came up. Everything in me said to let it go, it never ended up being her and I usually embarrassed myself in front of some random beautiful stranger, but that argument had never stopped me before and soon I was walking quickly in the direction she had headed in. I went around the corner without even looking and found myself colliding with another cart being directed by a familiar looking guy.

"Gordo! No way, man! How random, I never thought you'd still be around Hillridge after all these years. How ya been?" It took a while before I could place the younger man standing in front of me but recognition came flooding in soon enough.

"Wow, Matt! This _is_ random. I've been good, how are you. . .and Lizzie?" I was trying to get myself out of the shock my body was slowly slipping into and held tightly to the cart in front of me. "Is she here too?"

Matt smiled at me before answering. "Yeah, she's here too. We're both good and we've moved back to town." That was the answer to the question I wanted to ask and was thankful he hadn't made me ask it. They were back, she was back in town, back in my life. At least I hoped that was what this meant. Then my heart reminded me the last time I had been so excited about her being in my life and the pain that followed. "So, um. . .hey Gordo, look I know that the way everything was left all those years ago wasn't exactly something out of a happy ending, but I can tell you that she has regretted it ever since. I can't count the amount of times she would cry to me all night, phone in her hand trying to call you."

"Matt, don't. . .That was a long time ago, let's not relive it here in a grocery store." I really didn't want to hear anyone defending her, not while I was being reminded just how wrecked my life had been. She wasn't the only one who had spent nights crying over the last years. "Five years ago is a long time to start hashing up all that happened again."

"Actually it's been six, well almost." My heart froze at the sound of her voice with a combination of anger and lost love. I slowly turned to look at her and found that besides being six years older, Elizabeth Brooke McGuire looked just the same as her memory. Her blonde hair was longer than it had ever been and much curlier than I remembered her liking it in school. But her smile and face still warmed me all over and nearly caused me to melt where I stood when she flashed a nervous smile my way. "It's good to see you."

"Same." I berated myself internally, I have six years of reunion fantasies to draw off of and all I can come up with is 'same'? Yep, she still had that effect of speechlessness over me. Not much had changed it seemed. I returned the smile she sent me this time when I saw the way her shoulders relaxed. She must have been nervous with how I'd react, apparently she'd been ready for the worst.

"Look, Gordo." She took a deep breath, whatever she was trying to say was obviously not an easy thing to get out. I was slightly surprised with myself at how well I could still read her body language, but then again I had loved this girl all my life. "There's a lot I have to explain to you, a lot you deserved to know six years ago before I left your life without a goodbye."

"Lizzie, it's like I was telling Matt, the past is the past, let's just let it go and move on." That was not at all what I had told my mouth to say. _Hell yeah I deserved to know and still do!_ Now that was more like it, too bad that hadn't been out loud.

"No, Gordo. I owe you at least an explanation." She sighed again, looking down to her hands. "I'd ask you over tonight to our house for some dinner, but we've only just got here today and still haven't unpacked a thing."

For some reason unknown to me, my mouth opened and seized the opportunity presenting itself before me. "Then why don't you guys come over to Gordon Manor for dinner, of course, by Manor I mean the same old house I grew up in and have lived all my life." I added a slight comical bow, hoping to ease the mood and make it easier for both to accept the invitation.

"Hey, I know I'd love to! No offense, Liz, but I can't take another night of something from a microwave." Well, there was one. Now I waited for the one I was really hoping for and stared hopefully into her eyes.

"Yeah, okay. Sounds good. What time do you want us over?" Despite the lack of complete excitement in her tone, I could feel the same hope from years ago rising inside of me, despite my heart's best tries to warn me against it.

"Well, it's five now and Gabriel usually likes to have dinner ready by seven, so is two hours from now good?" I saw a slight drop in her eyes, almost looking like disappointment for a second, then she recovered.

"Seven it is then, I still have the way to your house memorized. We'll see you then." She turned to leave, Matt giving her a pity filled smile when she was facing him, before she turned around quickly and added, "Oh, I almost forgot! Is it okay if we bring along a third person? We have a uh. . .room mate."

There was something in the way she had searched for the words room mate to describe this third person that made me reenact her disappointed eye drop. "No problem, but I'd better get home and let Gabriel know we'll have company besides the usual three." I flashed them a smile and turned my cart toward the checkout lines and rushed home. Gabriel, my mother's care giver and all around great house keeper slash cook slash maid, really wasn't big on surprise dinner guests. Even though it happened far too often with some producer or studio exec needing to be talked around to some idea we weren't seeing eye to eye on, I still tried not to drop changes on her with such short notice.

As I was driving home I began to think about all that actually had changed in my life over the last nearly six years. Then I had been seventeen and half way through my senior year when my life had crashed. Now I was twenty three, a graduate from film school with a some what already established career thanks to some very successful independent films I made while still in college. I wondered the rest of the drive home if Lizzie had seen any of the mainstream movies I had directed over the last two years, or if she'd been watching the AFI awards last year when I won the only award that actually carried some credibility. As I walked in through the front door I was relieved to see Gabriel hadn't started preparing anything as she was still helping my mother with her daily jumble puzzle in the paper.

"Gab, I have a huge favor to ask." Gabriel, who stood no taller than five foot five looked up to me with her round wrinkled face and smiled. She was a very strong woman for someone who had just turned fifty two the week before and she wore her graying brunette hair beautifully.

"Let me guess David, you've invited someone over for dinner and you need me to pull out all the stops and win them over with good food so they'll agree to whatever crazy stunt you've got brewing in your head." I returned the warm smile to the woman. She really was someone I had come to hold dear to my heart, almost like a grandmother or second mother.

"Close, it's just some very old friends who have just moved back into town. But, there's three of them, I hope that's okay." I gave her my best pleading look and received a small chuckle as she gave in.

"You know I can't say no to those eyes. Help your mother with her puzzle and I'll get dinner started, David."

"Thanks, Gab. You really are the best, you know that right?"

"Don't lay it on too think, save some of that charm for your friends. I haven't seen you this excited to have someone coming over since that nice gentlemen with the sexy gray beard." I smiled and shook my head.

"His name was George Lucas, only my all time hero. Although, if I remember, I wasn't the only one hanging on his every word. . ." I ducked to avoid the dishtowel that sailed through the air at my head. I gave into the giddy feelings overcoming me the closer it came time for Lizzie to arrive and started laughing harder than I had in years. I walked over to the seat Gabriel had vacated next to my mother. "Mom, guess who's coming to dinner, Lizzie and Matt. Remember them from down the street?"

My mother looked up at me and smiled big then nodded. "She's the girl that always came around with that dear Miranda. Is Miranda coming over too? It's been a while since she dropped by, she's such a sweet girl." I massaged my mother's shoulder and kissed her cheek.

"No mom, Miranda had to go away on business for a few weeks remember? She came and told you the other day and brought you those pretty flowers you liked so much?" I watched with a little sadness as my mom slightly tilted her head and found the memories before smiling her big smile and nodding again.

"Those really are some pretty flowers. I wonder what Gabby's done with them. . ." She returned to looking at the words before her and I let my mind drift to remembering the last six years again.

flashback

"Mr. Gordon, I'm afraid there's little good news to deliver." The doctor's thin face held the grief of the words he was probably all to familiar with delivering. "Your father wasn't able to pull through, he was just too seriously injured, and your mother has suffered some permanent brain damage from the trauma to her head in the accident. There's still no way to know how severe it is, but she will make a full physical recovery at least. I am sorry, son." The only other thing I remember from that night was being held by Miranda in my mother's hospital room, wishing Lizzie was there too.

end flashback

I was startled out of memories of that night by the doorbell sounding loudly through the house. I stood up, wiped my eyesand walked to the door, wondering how I could have been lost in those painful thoughts for over an hour. Matt was standing alone on the porch when I opened the door.

"Hey, Gordo. Lizzie's coming, she just had a little trouble with getting. . .our room mate out of the car. She said she'll be right up." He walked past me and into the house after I waved him in with a nod and I left the door open as I followed him in through to the Living room. "Hello, Mrs. Gordon. How are you?" Matt sat down on the couch across from her favorite chair, the chair that had been my father's favorite. She looked up at him and gave him her big smile.

"I'm doing fine, dear. I'm sorry, but do I know you?" I could see Matt shift uncomfortably and remembered that they couldn't have known about what happened two years ago, they had know idea about the car accident.

"Oh, sorry." I sat down next to Matt on the couch. "Mom, this is Matt McGuire, remember I told you he and Lizzie were coming over to dinner?" She nodded and smiled again before I turned to Matt and lowered my voice. "Sorry, I forgot you guys wouldn't know about this. My parents were in an accident a little over two years ago driving back from Los Angeles. They were hit by a drunk driver. My dad didn't make it and mom suffered some brain damage, but she's still all there, just has to let things work out a bit first."

"Oh, Gordo, I'm so sorry I wasn't here, I had no idea. That's awful!" Lizzie was standing in the entry way of the family room. She walked over to my mother and knelt down in front of her. "Mrs. Gordon? Hi, remember me, Lizzie?"

"Of course dear! Gordo's girlfriend. You were always such a sweet girl." I could feel the blush rising to my cheeks, but couldn't help the smile that was spreading across my face. "Have you seen Miranda? I think she forgot to come over tonight on her way home from work. We always watch the news together on Wednesdays, but she wasn't here when it came on."

"Mom, I told you Miranda's gone on business for a few weeks remember?" I saw the sad smile on Lizzie's face when my mom nodded her head and flashed her smile as she remembered. I decided to change the subject before anyone got too sad. "So, didn't you have someone else coming along?"

I watched Lizzie tense slightly as she stood up from in front of my mother and walked over to stand in the door way again. "Um. . .yeah we did." She took a few steadying breathes before continuing. "Gordo, I'd like you to meet someone who means the world to me. Someone who is my entire life." I felt my heart breaking as it screamed out an 'I told you so'. I watched her hand reach behind her and start to pull someone around in front of her. To say I was surprised would not do any justice to the shock that froze my body in place.


	2. A Memory

Madeline

Chapter Two - A Memory

Lizzie

"Um. . .yeah we did." I took a few steadying breathes before continuing. "Gordo, I'd like you to meet someone who means the world to me. Someone who is my entire life." I reached around behind me and took the small hand in mine as I pulled Madeline around in front of me. I watched Gordo freeze up completely, unable to move or speak from the shock of what I had just dropped on him. His eyes moved over the little girl in front of me, he started at her brown curls that made up her mop of hair. It was no longer than his was since it was such a hassle trying to keep it even the slightest bit combed out when it got much longer. He moved down to look into her big hazel eyes that were also taking in the man sitting on the couch before her.

"Gordo, I would like you to meet my daughter Madeline." I wasn't sure how much more he was ready to hear, or if I really had to say it out loud. She looked so much like him that it was a constant reminder of how much I missed him every day, not even Gordo was that dense. He may love me his entire life and only get around to realizing how deeply our senior year of high school, but this was even more obvious than our feelings for each other.

"Lizzie. . .is she. . .I mean, the hair. . .and. . .and, oh my God!" I could feel the tears rim my eyes as he got down on his knees in front of our daughter and took her into a tight hug starting to cry himself. "Why didn't you tell me?" He was still kneeling in front of a now slightly startled five year old girl, but was looking up at me.

"I found out right before my dad got transferred and we had to move in a week. I tried so hard to tell you that week that we were leaving and that I was having your baby, but I just couldn't Gordo. It was too hard. How could I tell you something like that and then just leave?" I knew it sounded weak as I said it out loud, and admittedly now, six years out from then, I really didn't understand how anything I did made sense to me then. But I had been scared out of mind, I was seventeen, pregnant and about to move across the country from the father. The only person I'd ever loved in my life up until then and since. "I know it sounds stupid, but I was scared. It just kept getting harder and harder to let you know. I would cry myself to sleep so many nights trying to call you but too afraid of how you'd react after I'd left without saying goodbye." My tears had started to fall from my eyes, something Madeline noticed.

"Mommy, why are you and this man crying?" Her tiny hand was in mine again tugging at my arm for attention.

"Madeline, sweetie, this. . .this is your father." Her tiny face scrunched up in thought. She let go of my hand and turned to face Gordo who was still crouched before her. She walked up to him and placed a tiny hand on his head and lifted some of his hair.

"Does your mommy have trouble getting this combed out too?" Gordo nodded, eyes brimming with fresh tears as the tiny hand released his hair and touched his wet cheek. "Why are you sad? Mommy only cries when she's sad." My heart was waiting to beat and my lungs were holding a breath as Gordo raised his hand to the one on his cheek and wrapped it in his own.

"I'm not crying cause I'm sad. I'm crying cause I'm very happy to meet you Madeline. I didn't know I had a daughter, that I was a daddy." I watched them look at each other, wishing this had happened long ago, wishing Gordo and our daughter weren't just meeting for the first time when she was five. He should have had the chance to have her in his life as I had.

"Why are you my daddy?" She scrunched her face up again, Gordo's following suite soon after as he tried to develop an answer to that question.

"Hey Mads, why don't we go wash up for dinner okay?" I sent a smile of thanks to my younger brother as he scooped up Madeline and headed towards the bathroom, giving me and Gordo some time to talk.

"I'm sorry to just drop this on you out of nowhere. I really wish you could have been a part of her life before now, I'm sorry." I didn't know what else to say, I did not know if there was more to say. Gordo stood up in front of me and closed his eyes before reaching out and taking me into a hug. I just stayed there with my head on his shoulder, letting my tears run onto his neck and waited for him to speak.

"Lizzie, I can't tell you how pissed I want to be at you right now, but I just can't find a good reason that over rides the pure joy I feel at the moment. You really should have let me know, I should have been allowed to be there with you through this." I could feel his own tears falling to my neck along with his breath on my skin as he spoke. "I have a beautiful little girl in there, and I missed out on the first five years of her life, but I can't do anything right now but just get excited about this."

I could feel a warmth easing it's way into my heart as most of my fears were subsided. This was going much better than I thought it ever would. A part of me wanted to believe in a story book, Disney movie ending but reality and experience of raising a baby through college as a single parent had stripped most of my ability to dream away. "Gordo, I just want you to know that you don't have to take on any extra responsibilities concerning her. You have a great career working out and I don't want you to think I'm trying to drop her into your lap now to ruin everything. I just wanted you to finally know, and when I got this job offer near Hillridge I knew I had to take it."

"Shh." He placed a finger on my lips before I could babble any more. "Lizzie, she's my daughter. There's no way I'm not taking as much of the responsibilities as possible for her. I have five years to make up for here, remember." I let a few more tears slip to my cheeks. "I didn't think for a second that you were trying to get something out of me now that I've got something to take. Oh, hey, I'd better let Gabriel know we have a smaller guest, see if we have anything but wine to go with her dinner!" I stiffened in his arms as I was reminded there was another woman here, I had forgotten. My heart burst a little but I hadn't placed too much hope in happily ever after so it didn't break.

"Yeah, I still need to meet her anyway." I followed him from the room and into the kitchen where I was just straight out confused by the sight that greeted me. A short and round elderly woman was working over the stove cooking something that smelled just heavenly. For a second I worried for the boy next to me but then everything clicked into place when Gordo introduced the two of us.

"Gabriel, this is Lizzie. Lizzie, this is Gabriel Jameson, my mother's care taker and the only reason I and this house remain functional." The relief running through my body caused the biggest smile my face has held in years to stretch from ear to ear as I shook her preferred hand, after she'd wiped it off on a towel next to the stove.

"It's nice to meet you ma'am."

"Call me Gab or Gabby, never ma'am. I'm not that old. . .at heart." I liked this woman instantly. There was something inviting and enveloping about her smile and voice.

"Sure thing, Gabby. Call me Lizzie." She sent another smile my way before looking at Gordo.

"Are the other two here yet, It's just about ready and you know how I like to keep everything running on track around here, it's easier on your mother if things happen at the same time every day." As if on cue my brother came walking in to the kitchen holding his niece in his arms, eyes taking in all the items of food and his stomach registering what looked the most appetizing.

"Now that's timing! I wish I could get some of my actors to get their cues down that well." Matt gave Gordo a weird look before shrugging. "Gab, this is Matt, Lizzie's brother and this is someone really special. I would like you to meet Madeline. . ." He looked at me, realizing he didn't know much more than that about his daughter.

"Zephyr McGuire." I finished her full name for him, glad to see the smile that covered his face at hearing his own middle name.

"I tried to stop her, but she was very adamant about using something of your name and David goes even worse with Madeline than Zephyr." I threw a look at Matt as he talked.

"Like I was saying, this is Madeline Zephyr McGuire, my daughter." The older woman turned off the stove with a happy squeal and abandoned whatever it was she'd been cooking and rushed happily over to Gordo, giving him a huge hug.

"Oh, David, how wonderful!" She gave him another squeeze then walked over to Matt and Madeline. "I'm very pleased to meet you Madeline, my name's Gabby." My daughter put her hand in the pudgy one held out to her but jumped from Matt's arms into a hug for the woman smiling at her.

"Well, she's never done that before." I watched Gabby return the soft squeeze from my daughter before walking with her in her arms to Gordo and handing her over to him.

"Now all of you go out and sit at the table. I'll have everything out in a second. David, could you get your mom to the table?" Gordo nodded and said he would leaving the room with Matt right behind him.

"Do you need any help with anything?" I was still a little surprised at the way Madeline had jumped in to this woman's arms.

"Oh, don't worry dear. I've got a handle on it all, but thank you." I smiled again at her and followed Gordo and my brother to the dinning room where they were trying to situate Madeline into a booster seat that, by the looks of it, had to have been recently pulled out of somewhere it had sat since Gordo had used it.

I just watched them both and smiled. Maybe things really would work out somehow. I didn't have any idea how Gordo felt for me anymore but I could tell he was falling completely in love with Madeline and that was all I needed to find myself falling completely in love with him again, although truthfully I had never fallen out of love. Falling deeper in love was the only thing that made sense, I was falling deeper in love with David Gordon and I only hoped that he felt the same for me and that he could forgive me for the past six years of our lives.


	3. I'm Dying Inside

Madeline

Chapter Three - I'm Dying Inside

Matt

I was driving back to the house Lizzie and I had rented after she discovered the commute between here and her new job was less than forty miles. The idea of coming home was too good to pass up. We both really saw Hillridge as just that, home. It was where we had grown up through childhood and it was were most of our friends and memories were. We had both been in high school the year we had been jerked away by our parents to the hell hole named Oklahoma. We hadn't stayed a minute longer than we had too when I turned eighteen and graduated. Lizzie transferred into Washington State where I got excepted and we'd shared the extra weight of Madeline, going to classes and arranging our schedules so that one of us was always home with my niece. Now it had been my turn to transfer down to a smaller university near Hillridge when Lizzie got offered her job after graduating near the top of her major. At twenty one years old I had no regrets with the way my life had gone so far and I held nothing against Lizzie or Madeline, a fact that surprised most people I knew. Of course this was a pretty small list since being responsible for a child left little room outside of school, work and home, and therefore, little time to hang out and make friends.

"Matt, do you ever regret growing up so fast? I mean you didn't get to have the classic college experience. You never had the time to with helping raise Madeline." I rolled my eyes at my sister, the same response she got every time she asked me this question. I knew she only asked it when she was really bothered by something and I had a pretty good idea what that something could be at the moment. I ignored her spoken question and answered the hidden ones she was really asking me.

"I don't know if he wants you in his life as more than the friends you were for so many years, but I do know that Madeline already has a huge place in his heart. He fell in love with her, hard. The only other time I've ever seen Gordo smiling so much, you had just told him that you loved him." Lizzie was staring out the car window and never responded but I knew she had heard and that I had given her something to think about. I really hoped that everything would work out perfect, but I knew that life was not in the habit of doing that. Not without one hell of a fight and I wasn't sure Lizzie had the strength to fight two of those battles in one life time.

"I'm just tired of being alone. I'm tired of being a single parent. I'm just really tired of this, Matt. I really don't know if I would have ever made it this far without you, but I'm tired of falling asleep and waking up to a half empty bed and a half empty heart. I'm tired of not being complete." Her words were new, but not the feelings. I knew she had felt this way for a long time but she'd never found the words until tonight. A little sadness crept into my heart as I thought about how my life would entirely change if Lizzie and Gordo did end up picking up where they had left off. Madeline would have two parents and they would have each other. I would become simply Uncle Matt and I would be alone for the first time ever in my life. I had never lived in an apartment or house where I was not a major part of a family. Growing up I had been the brother, the son. Then with Madeline and Lizzie I had been the other half of the central core of our own little family of sorts.

"You know, Lizzie, I hope you never have to be alone again. I truly hope Gordo's feelings for you haven't changed and that you and Madeline can finally be completed with Gordo, the way it was always meant to be. I just hope I can find a family of my own once you three have yours." She looked sadly over at me as if just realizing the same thing for the first time as I had.

"Oh my God, Matt. I've never really thought about that aspect of all of this. I can't even imagine a life without you being in a major role of it. I had just always added in Gordo to the equation and kept everything else the way it is now, just with a little more time for you to be a twenty year old college kid and not a father to my child." I saw the beginning of tears and hated that I had upset her with this.

"Lizzie, don't cry. I didn't mean it to sound as depressing as it did. I know I'd be alright in the end, it's just getting to the end and living with the in between parts of life. Who knows, maybe the person that completes me is waiting here in Hillridge for me." I was relieved to see her smile before returning my attention to the road and driving. My last words echoed in my head along with a growing hope in my heart that someone was waiting for me and that she hadn't given up hope and moved on.

Flashback

"Matt, I can tell something is really wrong. You haven't said a single word to me since we've been laying here. I know you aren't that fascinated with the constellations." I turned to face the beautiful girl beside me, the one person I had ever developed deep feelings for and tried to find the words as my heart was breaking. I knew this would hurt her, bad, but there was no way around it. Me and Lizzie had sworn to each other that we'd tell them both tonight, our last night.

"Miranda, this is going to be the hardest thing I will ever have to say in my life." I watched the apprehension swarm into her eyes as she looked deeply into mine, waiting to have her world destroyed along with mine. "I know we've only been dating since the end of last school year, but in the last six months I've fallen in love with you. I've never known the feelings you give me and I will never find them with anyone else, I know that already in my heart, but that only makes this that much harder to tell you." I took a few shaky breathes and fought back the tears before finding the courage to tell her. "My dad got transferred to Oklahoma and we have to move there, tomorrow."

My heart tore into pieces as I watched hers shattering right before me and I couldn't do anything to help her. "Why?"

Her question asked a lot of things that I could not answer and really had no idea of myself. Most of me knew the only reason we were going was my parents had some stupid notion that they could somehow save themselves from their shitty marriage just by getting 'a new start'. As if all the answers to their problems lay in Oklahoma and not in the fact that they tried to play the blissful couple all the time while they were simply ignoring that they had problems. "I don't know. I really just don't know. But I've been assured they do have phones and internet there so we can stay in touch. I'll email you everyday, I promise."

end flashback

I remember thinking how I really thought that would happen, how I really saw the two of us surviving on nothing more than written words on a computer screen, that we wouldn't get wrapped up in our own lives and forget a day or two to write until a day or two became months until one of us found the courage to say what we both were feeling.

yet again

Matt,

Writing this is hard, I tried calling you to say this over the phone but I chickened out. We both know this isn't any kind of a relationship and that we need to move on. Maybe someday we'll be together again, like in the same town and a part of each others lives, but more than likely your parents destroyed our chance at true love to try and pretend they had it too. I hope this isn't goodbye forever.

Miranda

end flashback

The words were forever imprinted on my brain. I had printed out that e mail and read it over and over until I could recite it word for word. I still carried the folded, worn paper in my wallet, the only thing I had of her.

"Earth to Matt, hey bro! We're home you can turn off the car and come inside now." I was a little surprised to see that we were sitting in the drive way of our new home and tried to recall actually driving to here and wondered how we hadn't crashed into something along the way or that I had actually made it to a specific destination.

"Yeah, sorry. Guess I just drifted off there for a sec." I climbed out of the car and took the sleeping form of Madeline from my sister as we walked to the door so she could unlock the door and let us in. "You know, there is one thing I regret now."

Lizzie looked puzzled at me until she remembered her earlier question. "That took you long enough to come up with, spill." I laid Madeline down on her newly assembled bed and began undressing her while Lizzie grabbed an old t shirt of mine that Madeline loved to sleep in from a nearby open box labeled, Madeline's sleep shirts. After we had her changed and under her favorite blanket with the night light in the corner switched on we walked back out to what would eventually be a living room.

"I regret not telling Miranda all about Madeline. I mean we drifted apart mostly by the end of that school year and she sent me that last email four days after Mads was born, but I should have written her back at least." I dropped into a fold out chair and started aimlessly going through an open box in front of me.

"Yeah, me too. She was my best friend. I really have no idea why I just cut everything off with her and Gordo after we moved. I let myself believe that after I wasn't dealing with school, the pregnancy, and our parents disappointment in me at the same time that it'd be easier. Of course having a baby is a lot more time consuming than carrying one." Lizzie began sorting through a few boxes herself, sitting in the only other chair in the house. We hadn't had any furniture other than Madeline's bed and a few dressers that hadn't come with our apartment in Washington and we hadn't had a chance to actually buy any yet, so the house was pretty bare other than the numerous boxes holding most of our life's possessions littered through out the house and various rooms.

"It was good to find out that neither her or Gordo are dating anyone else at the moment though. Do you think she'd give me another try, now that I'm here to stay?" I asked my sister the question with a smile but knew she could see right through any joking pretense to the fact that I was really hoping the answer would be yes.

"I hope so Matt, I really do. I know how much you two were in love before and I know that you still feel the same. I hope she does too, but look at what happened between mom and dad. If they can drift apart, I don't think there's much hope for anyone."

"Never compare what we have to our parents Lizzie. Not you and I, not you and Gordo, and not Miranda and me." I watched my sister flinch at the tone of my words. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to jump on you. Just never judge the ability of love on those two, okay." I knew that Lizzie had a much less bitter view of our parents than I did, but I really had trouble loving them beyond the required amount a son has for the two people that gave him life.

"You're still angry at them for everything aren't you?" She knew the answer, we'd had this conversation just before moving when mom had called to tell us to drive safely and to call when we got into town.

"I always will, Lizzie. They destroyed our lives and put us through that bullshit just to end up divorcing each other the minute you and I are out of the house? How can I ever not hold them in contempt. I really hate them for everything they put you through over the pregnancy and when you decided to keep her. I'll never forgive dad screaming that you had made the biggest mistake of your life and that you were on your own. Never." My gaze was penetrating her eyes as she stared back into mine.

"Matt, I've let it go. Why can't you?" She sighed and looked away blinking away tears before they could fall. "They've really tried these last few years to make up for everything, even dad. You can't stay mad at them forever."

"I can try." We settled into a very uncomfortable silence before Lizzie grabbed a blanket from a box and headed to what had been designated her room.

"Goodnight, Matt. I love you."

"I love you to, sis." I waited until she disappeared from view and added under my breath, "If I can somehow fix everything with Miranda, then I'll try to forgive them, I'll try."

A/N - I'm rereading through these chapters as I post them, catching mistakes here and there. I'm a little suprised at how easily I'm getting back into this story, also I'm a little dissapointed in myself at how quick everything is happening and how short the chapters are. Oh well, everyone has to begin somewhere I guess. Please let me know what you think so far if you have just stumbled upon this story for the first time, and if you read before, please take a sec to let me know you found me again. THank you for reading again, or for the first time.


	4. I Know The Way It Should Be

Madeline

Chapter Four - I Know The Way It Should Be

Gordo

The next morning I woke up happier than I had in a number of years. I had spent the whole night lost in dreams of love, marriage and the rest of my life with Lizzie and of course the beautiful daughter we already shared, Madeline. I all but skipped from my room upstairs down to the kitchen where I was greeted by the always smiling face of Gabriel, my mother's care giver. Her eyes twinkled brightly at me as she placed my mother's breakfast on a plate and put it in front of her on the breakfast table.

"So, how's the new father this morning!" I smiled happily at her as I grabbed some of the bacon sitting on the stove before answering.

"I haven't felt this great since, well since a long time ago. I have a beautiful daughter who I've fallen in love with and I think I just might be falling harder for her mother all over again. How are you?" I sat myself down next to my mother and kissed her forehead.

"Good morning! Isn't it just great today? Is Miranda back yet?" I grinned at the woman beside me and wondered just how in the world it was that Miranda meant so much to her. I figured it was mostly due to the fact that Miranda was around the most besides Gabriel. Even with me living here I could still be gone for months at a time shooting a movie, but Miranda hardly ever was called away with her job and had basically adopted my mom as her own, placing her in a very special place of her heart.

"Miranda will be back this weekend I believe, and it is a very beautiful day outside. Are you going to work on your flowers today?" My mother loved to be outside in the sun, fussing over her immaculate flower beds that surrounded a good portion of the house on all sides.

"I was just asking her that very question before you bounced in here. I would hate to pass such a nice day up and stay inside." I watched the big smile spread across her face as my mother nodded her head in agreement with Gabriel's words. "Well, I guess I have my answer then. What do you have planned for the day, if I may ask."

"You can always ask, I won't always answer, but you can always ask." I ducked another kitchen towel that sailed though the air playfully. "Actually, I was planning on dropping in on Lizzie, Matt, and Madeline to see if they needed any help unpacking or whatever. Do you need me for anything today?"

"Nothing comes to mind, but I might have you swing by the store again later since you seemed to miss most of the list last night." Her warm smile caused a slight blush to rise to my cheeks.

"Oh, right, well I was a little preoccupied with having my dreams coming true with Lizzie coming home." I hugged my mother as I stood up and repeated the move with Gabriel as I left the kitchen and headed up stairs to begin my day. "Thanks, Gab. I don't know what I'd do without you, but it wouldn't be pretty." Her cheeks reddened under the compliment.

I had just walked into the room that had once been my father's library but had since been converted into my home office when the phone rang. "Hello?"

"David, this is Peter Vangriel. We have a slight problem with some of the film from last weeks shoot. It seems to have been exposed and is completely unusable." I sighed into the phone and closed my eyes, this couldn't be happening today, I had to go see Madeline.

"Well, how much and what scenes? Are we going to be able to easily reshoot it or are we talking a major rework here?" I crossed my fingers and hoped for the best. Peter was a miracle worker and if any editor could save the film he'd find a way. It was the reason he'd done the work on every single movie I had made to date, the man knew his stuff and was hard to beat.

"No major reworks, but you will have to reshoot the last scene. I wasn't able to restore very much quality to it after I fixed everything. Most of it should be fine other than that, but I knew you'd want to know and come have a look."

"Actually, we have to shoot some of the opening scenes in a week from now so we'll just take care of it all then, if that's okay by you." I knew that would shock my friend and long time colleague, I had never put anything off for another time when it came to my movies. I wanted them fixed the minute something went wrong, but not today. I had something more important to me than the last scene of my latest movie, I had a daughter to experience and a lost love to restart.

"Are. . .are you sure?" I smiled at the expected shock in his voice as I answered.

"Very, I've got some family things happening right now that need my attention." I liked the sound of the word family. "Just do what you can Peter, I know it will be nothing short of amazing, and we'll work with what we've got next week. Thanks." I ended the call there and left the room. I needed to shower and get out of the house before anyone else decided to call and find some reason for me to be kept busy today and away from my daughter.

A half hour later I was sitting in my car on the curb in front of the house they'd given me the address for last night. There were no cars in the drive way and I was about to just go when I saw someone walk across the large window in the front of the house. I stood up and walked to the front door and laughed at myself for feeling nervous. Before I knocked the door was pulled open and Matt was standing there in his boxers and the shirt he'd worn last night. "I wondered if you were gonna get out of your car."

"Oh, well I wasn't sure if anyone was home." I followed him into the house after he waved me in and turned towards the kitchen.

"Lizzie's already left for work, her first day, and Madeline's still asleep, but you're welcome to hang around with me and unpack. We've only got the one car so when Lizzie's gone, I'm stranded unless I walk or take a cab." I chuckled at the sarcastic enthusiasm behind his words as he said 'unpack' as if it were the most fun game in the world.

"Sounds great. Where do we start?" I looked around the room and took in the number of boxes still taped shut and wondered what I'd gotten myself into.

"Well, we can't really do much with most of the boxes until we get some furniture and shelves and crap, but I am really looking forward to getting something over all the windows. I hate being able to see people out of them, cause that means they see me too."

For the next hour Matt and I went through box after box looking for blinds and curtains, but having no luck what so ever. "Matt, I give up. I don't think you have any in these boxes. Let's just go buy some."

"Hey! It's you again!" Both of us looked at the young girl that had just strode into the room wearing an old Washington State t shirt that drug along the ground it was so big on her. "What are you doing at my new house?"

"I'm just trying to help your uncle Matt find covers for the windows." My heart filled with love for her and I felt a small burn in my eyes as I watched her small frame walk over and look out the large window.

"But why? Then we can't see the sun!" I was amazed at how simple the logic was and yet how foreign. I had never been one to allow an easy view inside my world, neither personal nor material, but one little innocent question and I was questioning myself on why that was.

"Careful, Gordo. She'll have you changing your entire life philosophy if you're not careful." I nodded at the knowing glance from Matt. "She's good at asking those very deep and simplistic questions. I know I'm a deeper thinker because of her."

I just watched my daughter for a few more moments as she closed her eyes and spread her arms out as if absorbing the sun rays coming through the window and warming her small body and face.

"She's just amazing. I missed out on way too much of this stuff." Matt nodded his understanding before getting his niece's attention by clearing his throat.

"Mads, you need to find some going out clothes. We have to go buy some things for the house since it appears your mom decided not to pack them or left the box behind when she did." Madeline shuffled her feet across the floor and into her room. "You coming along or do you have something to do?" I looked at Matt and wondered about the mischievous grin on his face.

"My day is cleared. I wanted to spend some time with Madeline so I am definitely going. But why are you grinning like that? Do you know something that I don't?"

"Just one thing, what it's like to go to a store with a curious five year old. You my friend are in for Daddy 101, get ready." He left the room with a laugh resembling an evil villain. I watched him go and decided he was just messing with my head. Madeline couldn't be too bad, she was so quiet. How hard could this possibly be?

A few minutes later and we were in my car driving to the closest store we thought would have what we were looking for. I watched Madeline in my rear view mirror for most of the short trip and thanked whatever fates had decided to have her placed in my life like she should have been from the beginning. I laughed lightly when she returned my stare and waved at me in the reflection, I was happier at that moment than I could ever remember before in my life as I waved back to her and she giggled.


	5. Even Though It Was Right

Madeline

Chapter Five - Even Though It Was Right

A/N-Thanks to the four who reviewed already. It's great to see some familiar names and new ones. I know this is not exactly the most original plot line ever, though just on a small side note, there were a lot less Lizzie with a kid Gordo doesn't know about stories when I originally posted this story. Still, over all, it is a well traveled plotline. I am basically simply reposting this story, profreading and fixing plot conflicts and grammar when it needs it. This is definitely one of my earlier stories, I can tell in my writing. It's pretty basic, yet a simple love story rarely needs to be complicated. That's what makes them hard to write, the reason I stopped writing my other stories. Hopefully my hiatus provided the break I needed to give them another try. Having them unfinished is really bugging me. Thanks again, and it is definitely good to be back and see my story listed again.

Matt

I laid in bed and stared at the ceiling for a few more minutes before giving in to the excitement that was churning through my body and headed to the bathroom. It was Saturday morning, early morning, and Miranda was due home by noon today. Gordo hadn't told her who would be waiting for her when she got home, although I could tell he'd had a hard time keeping it to himself while they'd talked on the phone last night. Gordo had agreed to pick her up from the airport and had gladly offered me his car so I could surprise her. He seemed to think it would be a great idea, I however was starting to worry she'd be less than happy to see me with no warning, first thing after stepping off a plane.

I turned the shower on and waited for steam to begin rising from the floor of the tub before adding some cold water, but just enough that I wouldn't get scalded. I still liked to have steam rising off of me when I stepped out of the shower. It had been something from one of Miranda's favorite movies that had stuck in my head and it was yet another thing I used to keep a small part of her fresh in my mind everyday. As I let the near burning water rush over my body I let my mind drift and run through the events of the past week. It was almost like remembering a dream after waking up, but thankfully I knew it was all real. Gordo had pretty much taken up all of my time over the past week and I was grateful for the chance to actually talk to someone who was out of Kindergarten. I loved Madeline with all my heart, but still she was a little young for serious conversation or even just plain conversation. If I ever needed someone to help me work out the finer points of a Disney cartoon, she was my girl, but working out the finer points of my life I needed someone who had lived a little of a life themselves.

I smiled as memories flooded through my mind of all the times I had looked over and found Gordo just completely entranced with whatever my niece was doing and a small amount of jealousy sprang inside of me. I laughed it away but not before I knew full well what it was about. I wanted my own Madeline, sure I had been basically filling the role of her father for five years, but it wasn't the same, not anymore. Her father was in her life and he was making a big effort to make sure she became a huge part of his. I was the uncle, a very cool and close uncle, but uncle none the less. My heart began to ask just one question of me for the rest of my shower and the entire morning until I was driving around the airport trying to find a place to park, _Do you think she's ready to start a life together?_

It was stupid to actually be thinking of such a huge step so soon, I still wasn't sure if she really wanted me in her life again, let alone if she would want to start up our relationship again. I still had a semester of school left and I had no idea what I was going to do with my life, but I couldn't deny there were only two desires in my heart. Miranda and music. With a little regret I realized that both things I wanted to be in my future forever where the two things I kept running away from as soon as anything got difficult. I could have tried a lot more with Miranda when I moved and I could still be keeping contact with the other guys in my band. I had promised them both it would happen and I was repeating my sad performance with Miranda all over again.

I climbed out of Gordo's car and wondered briefly how in the world someone making millions could still drive such a small little beater around. It was time to face what I hoped would become my future, it was time to face Miranda. Suddenly six years seemed like a few life times as all my fears and doubts crashed in at once. This was such a bed idea. I swallowed hard as I looked over the arrivals and got her gate number. Her flight was on time, damn, I didn't even get the courteousy of more time to figure out what to say to her first. When I reached her gate, I sat down in a chair and began to try out a few opening lines, but hadn't found a single word good enough when the plane started unloading passengers. My heart began racing as I watched the crowd of people thin out as one by one, family and friends reunited and made their way to collect their baggage. I nearly dropped back into my seat after standing up and seeing her face searching the crowd and coming to rest on mine. For a minute she looked away again but quickly looked back in my direction, recognition flaring in her eyes. I wanted to wave, to smile, to run away quickly, but there was no chance my body was going to cooperate so I stood frozen while she slowly made her way over to me, confusion and excitement playing over her face.

"Matt! Are. . .are you waiting for someone?" I tried to nod but found I was still paralyzed so I tried out my vocal chords.

"I've been waiting for years." I wasn't sure if that made sense, but I was just happy to have responded with anything at that point. By the way her eyes teared up, I figured I got the basic message across.

"I knew Gordo was keeping something from me last night on the phone. He's never been good at hiding anything." I felt my lips respond with a smile and figured I would try moving again. This time my body seemed to have unthawed and I reached for her carry on bag.

"Allow me, did you have any other bags?" It wasn't the amazing romantic moment I had hoped on to sweep her off her feet, but it was a start. She nodded and I followed her as we made our way to collect the rest of her things. She kept looking at me and shaking her head in disbelief all the way out to the car, not saying another word until we were settled in and driving away from the airport.

"Well, I have to admit I was surprised to see you standing there when I got off the plane. I was starting to wonder if you'd ever drop by town again or if you'd moved on with your own life and left us all behind." I could hear the bitterness grow in her tone as she spoke. "Any reason you've dropped out of the sky again? Or are you finally getting around to responding to my last e mail and figured that after six years, face to face was the best policy?"

To pretend her anger surprised me would be wrong. I had expected much worse than this, but I still had hoped for the easiest scenario where everything would be perfect to begin with. "Miranda, I know you're pissed with me and you've got every right to be, but I am sorry for the way everything happened six years ago. I've spent every night dreaming about what our lives would be like now if my parents weren't complete assholes and pulled us away from those lives. I wonder every night I go to bed if we'll ever get to have that second try you talked about in your last letter and I pray that somehow we will. I wake up every morning and realize that the pain of you missing isn't going to go away, not until you aren't missing anymore." After I stopped talking, I realized all that I had just admitted to her. Well, at least now I didn't have to worry about how to say everything I wanted to. It all had been said.

Whatever reaction I had hoped for after my confessions, I wasn't ready to be slapped hard across the face. For a brief moment I tried to figure out the physics of how she'd managed to position her hand the way she had in such a small car, but that was soon pushed from my brain by the pain which was soon followed by the realization that she was now hugging into my side and crying.

"I'm. . .sorry, I shouldn't have done that, but. . .you. . .really have no idea how mad I've been at you for the last six years. I've tried to hate you, to move on, but I can't. I've never stopped checking my e mail everyday hoping you've responded. Do you know how many people laugh when I tell them my screenname?I never changed it so you would always know how to get a hold of me.As hard as I've tried to hate you and never think about you again, I've fallen more in love with you and can't get you off my mind." I pulled Gordo's car to the side of the highway and turned to look her in the eyes.

"Miranda, do you realize you just told me that you love me?" My heart was bursting with hope that she'd meant to say the words, hoping this could actually have a chance of happening.

"Yes, and I meant it. Pretty stupid, huh? I've spent all these years waiting for you to come back when you haven't even let me know you're still alive, let alone thinking of me."

"Not stupid at all. I. . .I've never stopped loving you either." She pulled away from me and sat up in the car seat before answering me.

"Matt, I can't do this though. I've dreamed of this moment for years, but now that it's happening I can't help but be afraid to trust you again." My heart stopped beating. "You really hurt me. You never tried to fight with me for breaking up, you never tried to make it seem like there was still hope. You just never did anything."

"I. . .I didn't know how to. There's so much that's happened in my life and so many things that were going on at the same time then. It's not any kind of reason for shutting you completely out of my life, but it's all I've got."

"It's not enough, Matt. At least not right now. I need to have you in my life for good for a while before Ican believe that you're not going to leave me again. I know it wasn't your fault, you had no choice but to move, but you didn't have to abandon me emotionally." I grasped onto the little hope that held for us, there was still a chance, it just had to be earned.

"Well, I can give you as much of my time as you want. I'm here for good Miranda and I want to be a part of your life, I can't live without at least that much."

"What do you mean? You've moved back to Hillridge?" I smiled at the excitement that had revealed itself in her words. "What about Lizzie, are you both back, did your parents move back into their house, did they fix everything between them?" She paused to take a breath and I stopped her before she could ask another question.

"Wait, slow down okay?" I waited until she nodded and took a deep breath before continuing.

"Me and Lizzie have moved back to Hillridge and are sharing a house. She's started a job and I'm finishing up school. As far as my parents go, they are divorced and I don't know anything beyond that and I don't care."

"Matt, I'm sorry." I sent a smile of thanks to her, knowing she really meant it. I pulled the car back onto the road and resumed the trip back to her apartment. "So, why did you move back to Hillridge of all places? Not that I'm complaining about getting my best friend and her _little _brother back, but still. . ."

I smirked at the joke she had managed to make at my expense. "When Lizzie got the job we looked it up on the map and saw it was only like forty miles or so and couldn't pass up the chance to come home, besides it's a great place to raise kids." I bit my lip at the slip, but relaxed when she laughed, thinking it a joke.

"Already planning out our future?" She laughed as my face grew red and my mouth opened and closed in an impressive imitation of a fish. "Relax McGuire, it was a joke."

I took the turn off for Hillridge from the highway and watched Miranda staring out the window as we drove through town, passing all the familiar stores and hangouts that hadn't changed much since I had left. I let the silence fill the car, enjoying the soft sound of her breathing and the soft hum of the tires on the road.

"Take the next left." She seemed as content as I was with the silence and only gave simple words of direction until we were sitting outside her apartment. "I'm looking forward to a nice long bath in my own bathroom, but what are you doing later this afternoon?"

"Nothing at all. You want to do something?" I could feel my hopes rising again and my heart returning to a quick pace as I waited for her to speak.

"That was the idea. Here's my number, give me a few hours then call me and we'll take it from there." She opened her door and got out, followed closely by me as I grabbed her bags and followed her to her door. "You don't have to get those you know, I am capable of carrying acouple ofbags up a few stairs."

"Yeah, but what kind of a gentlemen would I be if I let you? Mom may have destroyed my life, but she did ingrain those manners into me at a young age." I returned the warm smile that curved her lips. We walked up the stairs to her apartment where I waited for her to open the door and followed her in. "Where do you want these?"

"Just throw them back on the bed. I'll worry about unpacking later." I walked down the small hall that connected two bedrooms, a decent sized living room and kitchen while forming an entryway. It was obvious which room she used since the bed was unmade and clothes littered the floor. I tossed the bags on top of the pile of sheets on the bed then turned around to find her standing in the door way staring at me.

"Nice room, is this your attempt to rebel against your mom always getting onto you about cleaning your room?" She smiled and snorted, giving her shoulders a small shrug.

"You still remember that? Maybe she did have to tell me a hundred times a day, I just figured she was always exaggerating when she'd say that." She walked further into the room and closer to where I stood.

"Well, I guess I should let you get to that bath so I can call you and we can do something later." My stomach did a few flips when she placed her hand softly against my chest, stepping still closer to me.

"I guess you should." I leaned into a soft wonderful kiss that I hoped would never end. I deepened the kiss and ran my tongue along her lower lip, seeking entrance into her mouth and gaining it. We stood there for what seemed like hours but was no more than a few minutes, my tongue exploring her mouth and our arms wrapping around each other.

"Wow." I pulled away from her breathless and looked down into her eyes to find them filled with love and flaming desire. "I really should leave if we're going to take this slow." I whispered my warning to her as my hand gently stroked her cheek, hoping my words would be ignored. She turned into my hand and kissed my palm a few times before nodding and taking a few steps away from me.

"You're right, I'll walk you to the door." She turned around but didn't walk out of the room. "It would be best to take this slow, right? I mean we don't even know if we can still stand each other, people do change and stuff. . ." She trailed off, still looking at the wall and not at me.

"Miranda, it's up to you. . ." I didn't get any further before she'd swung back around and all but jumped into my arms, covering my mouth with her eager lips. I gave into the passions that surged through me and returned her kisses, forgetting about anything involving the word slow.

"Matt, promise me you won't hurt me again."

"I promise." There were few words after that shared between us, there was no time or need for them the rest of the afternoon as we revived the feelings we had been forced to ignore for years.


	6. In Front Of Me

Madeline

Chapter Six - In Front Of Me

Lizzie

"What time was her flight supposed to be in again?" I knew I was starting to annoy Gordo, and I knew the plane arrived as scheduled around noon today, but still I had nothing else to ask and I needed to do something other than just pace back and forth in Gordo's living room.

"Lizzie, calm down. I'm sure they're both fine and there is a perfectly good reason they aren't answering her home or cell phone. Maybe they stopped off somewhere to eat and catch up or something. Just calm down." His words made since, of course they would want some time to talk and catch up with each other. They were in love, well at least had been. I knew Matt was still consumed with Miranda and no one else, I just hoped for my little brother's sake that no one else was in Miranda's heart.

"How long do they need to talk! It's after five!" My impatience and anxiety were getting the best of me. If I didn't do something or something didn't happen soon I felt likeI was just going to scream. "Let's just drive over to her apartment and see if she's there and if she knows where Matt is."

"Lizzie. . .fine." What ever argument Gordo had been about to make got lost in his desire to just shut me up. I smiled to myself, thankful that some things never change, annoy him long enough and he'll eventually give in. It was something Miranda and I had figured out early in our friendship with him. "You get Madeline in the car and ready to go, I'll let Gabriel know where we're going so she can tell them if they call. Okay?"

"Thanks Gordo, that's why I love you." I kissed his cheek and turned to retrieve Madeline from her place on the couch where she'd been entertaining herself while I had paced. I noticed the way he tensed at my words, but decided to worry about it later and made my way to my car with my daughter in tow.

I had her strapped in and the car running before Gordo finally emerged from the house and climbed into the passenger seat next to me. He threw a quick smile to his daughter while he strapped on his seatbelt, then we were off.

"You'll want to take this left up here and then the next right." His voice startled me a little as he hadn't spoke since getting in the car. "If they're there we'll be able to see my car parked outside her apartment building."

I nodded my understanding and eagerly searched the area after making the second turn and almost screamed when I noticed Gordo's car. "Got ya!" I stuck my tongue out in response to the weird look Gordo threw me and parked next to his car.

"What exactly are you planning on doing now? You can't just drop in. There has to be a reason they're still not answering her phones." I caught the meaning in his words and my eyes grew big. I hadn't thought of _that_ being a possible reason no one had picked up and answered.

"You don't think they're. . .but, they haven't seen each other in six years!"

"All the more reason, don't you think?" My mouth dropped as I thought his last comment out. His face began to blush as the possible double connection was made in his own mind. "Not that I was thinking of the same thing when I, well actually I was, but after finding out about Madeline, I've had other things on my mind." I did my best to act shocked, but my mind started bringing up all the dreams and fantasies of the past six years, especially since deciding to move back to Hillridge.

"Well, try to call again." I didn't know where else to go from where we were so I just went with the first thing that came to mind. Gordo pulled his cellular phone from his pocket and said 'Miranda'. He then handed me the phone when it started to ring. "Hello? Miranda! Oh my God, how have you been!"

Gordo recoiled slightly from my screeching and Madeline started to giggle in the backseat like she always does when I get excited about something. "Couldn't you wait to do that until you saw her? Then I could have been prepared for it." I rolled my eyes at the boy next to me.

"Actually we're right outside your apartment in my car. I was getting too anxious to just sit around and wait and I was worried about you two." I waved up at her window when she looked out it. "Okay, we can give you guys five minutes, but we're breaking the door down if you don't answer this time." I hung up the phone and handed it back to Gordo, smiling big. "We have to wait a bit. Apparently Matt's having trouble finding where stuff landed." I snickered at Gordo's reaction and turned on the radio to pass the time. After listening half way through a second song I was ready to call it close enough and opened my door.

"Lizzie, why don't you go up alone and I'll follow you in a few minutes with Madeline. It'll give you a chance to talk everything out and let her get used to the idea." I smiled at him as my heart warmed again with love for him.

"You're just too sweet, David Gordon." I took a big breath and made a face at Madeline before standing up straight and going in through the first door which led into a small lobby and climbing the stairs I found there. I looked around at the eight doors there and realized I hadn't asked what her apartment number was. I was just about to start knocking until I found her when a door opened and she was standing there smiling at me.

"Technically we still have a minute, but I knew you would never wait that long. Where's Gordo, I thought he was with you." I rushed to her as she spoke and we hugged tightly.

"I've missed you so much, Miranda. You have no idea how much I've needed my best friend over the last six years. I'm sorry." I looked her in the face and smiled my sincerity to her before answering her question. "Gordo's following me up in a minute, he had an important call to make or something."

"Yeah, well, you should be sorry. But, you weren't the only one that never called." I looked behind her and saw Matt standing shirtless in the small hall/entry way blushing hard.

"So, I'm guessing you forgave Matt too?" Miranda let go of me and turned with a smile that was steadily growing, to look into my brother's eyes.

"Let's just say he has his _ways._" I made a face then slapped my brother on the back of his head as we walked by and into a cozy living room to sit down. "Okay, now Matt told me all about the family stuff, but I can tell there's something he's keeping. He almost slipped a few times when we were talking, but he's definitely gotten better at beating the McGuire 'tell all gene'."

"There is something big that happened in my life right before our parents moved us away." I swallowed and took a steadying breath before looking back into her face. "Do you remember homecoming night of our Senior year?"

"Of course! It was the first real date you and Gordo had ever been on and it was the first time we all actually got away with going to an parent free party." I could see all the memories playing across her eyes and I smiled at a few of my own. It had been quite a night.

"Well, Gordo and I snuck off into one of the rooms and. . ." I noticed Matt looking very uncomfortable sitting next to Miranda on her couch. "I'll let it go at that. Anyway, it wasn't the first time, and I was on the pill so we didn't worry about anything else and I had just started an antibiotic a few days before and forgot." I watched her face, hoping she would figure this out without me having to actually say it, but Miranda seemed unable to make the connection any quicker than I remembered from high school. "And I found out right before we moved that I was. . ."

A knock at the door stopped me from saying the last word. I sighed in frustration then stood up before Miranda could leave the room and stopped her. "Maybe I should get the door, I think I know who it is." Matt moved around us and went to the door. Miranda looked confused as hell at me but seemed unable to speak.

"Pregnant. I found out I was pregnant." The confusion left her face to be replaced by a blank stare and a few tears before she threw her arms around me and started crying in my shoulder.

"Oh, Lizzie! Why didn't you let me know! You needed me, I needed to be there. I wanted to be there, not even knowing this! Did Gordo know?" She stood up and looked me in the eyes, tears gone but the evidence they had been there was not. "If he knew and never told me I'll kill him."

"That's not a very nice thing to say!" The small voice brought a smile to my face when I caught sight of my daughter with her hands on her hips using her best reprimanding face and voice.

"Ahhh! You are so cute!" Before Madeline could react, Miranda had her in a hug and was swinging her around in circles. Gordo, Matt and I started laughing as the tiny girl in our friends arms looked around for any source of help. Finally, Miranda sat her down on the couch she'd been sitting in moments before and looked up at me and Gordo. "She's just gorgeous. She looks just like Gordo when we were little, but with Lizzie's eyes."

"Miranda, this is Madeline Zephyr McGuire. My daughter that I just found out about a few days ago. There's no way I could have kept this from you. If I had known I would have walked to Oklahoma to be there for my girls." I smiled at Gordo's words, figuring that there was some automatic programming that went into affect when a guy became a dad that made him say the weirdest things sometimes. 'My girls' was most definitely something my father would have said many years ago when he actually cared, not something a man in his twenties would make a habit of saying, unless he had a kid.

"Gordo, don't _you_ start talking like a parent too! Lizzie started that as soon as Mads was born and its driven me crazy for years. I was enjoying talking to a normal person, not a parent for once!" I slapped Matt's head again playfully but didn't even try to deny it. The last time I did Matt had recorded me and played it back. I didn't remember saying those things, but it had definitely been my voice. My mother's words, but my voice.

"Matt, I guess you just don't understand yet how much I really love the idea of being a parent. I figured that hearing me drone on about it all week would have clued you in." Matt shook his head and Gordo, then went and sat beside Miranda after ruffling Madeline's hair.

"Maybe someday I will." I watched his gaze drift andI thought about our conversation the night Gordo met our daughter and hoped for us both that someday was coming soon for us all. He took Miranda's hand in his and kissed it lightly.

We all four sat and stood where we were for a few minutes just watching Madeline fiddling with her hands to keep from being bored before Gordo spoke. "So. . .anybody else ready for some food? I know I'm starving." I smiled my thanks to him for breaking the silence and watched his eyes light up when Madeline screamed happily and ran to his leg which she clamped herself around excitedly.

"I'm ready! Let's go people! Move it, move it, move it!" We all got up and followed Gordo with Madeline in his arms out to the cars with smiles on our faces and laughter in her hearts. As I sat next to Gordo on the way to the Digital Bean, for old times sake, I couldn't help but think that things were going the way they should. Me and Gordo with our daughter and Matt and Miranda together. If life could get better than I would be surprised, of course with those words I knocked my knuckles against my dashboard after finding no actual wood and deciding it was close enough and received a look from Gordo as he drove, couldn't be too careful.


	7. It's Something

Madeline

Chapter Seven - It's Something

Miranda

"I just can't believe no one ever called me to let me know about Madeline." Matt and I were sitting on the couch in my apartment. He had been over every night all week as soon as I got home from work and usually left when I did in the mornings. He'd even spent Wednesday night with me and Mrs. Gordon watching the news and Wheel of Fortune. She'd been so happy that I 'finally had my Matt back', I guess I talked about him more than I realized over the last two years while we sat and watched the television in the Gordon's living room.

"Miranda, I know it sounds so stupid now, but we didn't know what in the hell was going on and Lizzie was scared, we both were. We weren't sure if our parents would both be there every morning when we woke up or if Dad would get pissed about something stupid and kick Lizzie out of the house, or any number of things. I know we should have called, and believe me we tried a few times but we never got the entire number dialed. I wrote you thousands of e mails but I never sent one. It's just not something you can write someone about or tell them over the phone, especially someone you love with all of your soul." I looked into his eyes and saw nothing but a longing for understanding and I tried for him.

Truth was, it really didn't make any sense at all to me, but I had no way of knowing how I would have reacted in the same situation. It couldn't have been easy and I was very thankful that I would never have to find out how I would handle the same circumstances.

"Matt, I can't fully understand, but I know you wouldn't have done anything to hurt me on purpose. I don't know what happened back then or why, and I don't need to. All I need to know right now is that you love me as much as I love you and that you will never cut me out of your life again."

"Now that's something I can answer easily. I love you more than anything in this world, only Madeline comes close to having as much of my heart as you do and that is how it's always been and always will be. I don't think. . .no, I know I couldn't face anymore of this life without you being in it. I love you and I need you, this week has only proven both of those to me over and over again."

I closed my eyes when I saw him leaning in for a kiss and let his tongue slide past my lips after they had connected with passion. In that moment, all the time spent hoping and waiting over the last six years was justified. He had said everything I needed to hear from him before I could let myself fall deeply and completely in love with him again, and now I had. Six years is a long time, but forever would eventually make them nothing more than a foot note in my life.

"Matt, I love you too. I need you in my life as much as you need me." I didn't get a single other word out for the rest of the night. We laid there and kissed on my couch until we had both fallen asleep in each other's arms.

When I woke up, Al Rooker was asking some woman what her sign meant and I watched the t.v. for a few minutes before my brain woke up and realized I usually watched this at work in the employee lounge while getting my morning coffee. "Oh, shit!" I jumped to my feet and deposited Matt on the floor before I started running around my apartment to get ready for work.

"Miranda, what in the world are you doing!" I didn't answer his question until I was breezing by the living room, looking for my shoes.

"I'm trying to find my other shoe so I can get to work before I'm really late." I rolled my eyes at how obvious an answer that had to have been if he'd just thought about it for a second.

"Oh. Need any help?" I looked at the couch on my way back by and saw he'd gotten off the floor, but had only laid back down. "I'll just stay out of your way." His words were muffled by the arm of my couch.

Having gotten dressed I grabbed my purse and keys and headed for the door. "Just let yourself out. What time were you supposed to be home to let Lizzie leave for work?" I heard him swear and the sound of someone frantically trying to pull on shoes that were tied too tight. A few seconds later he appeared in the door way.

"Could you give me a ride? I was supposed to be there at seven." I rolled my eyes at him for the fifth or sixth time that morning as he stretched and threw me his best innocent smile at the same time.

"Yeah, let's go. You know, that reminds me, how do you get over here and back every day?"

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "I walk, why?"

I didn't answer him, I only laughed all the way out to my car. When we were almost to his and Lizzie's house I heard myself make a suggestion that surprised me. "You know, if you wanted to just stay at my place, Lizzie could drop off Madeline on her way to work and you wouldn't have to run all the way back every morning."

Matt looked over at me and I could see the same question on his face that was screaming in my head. "What do you mean by staying at your place. Like for the day or. . ." I tried to answer him, but I wasn't sure what I had meant either.

"I don't know. It just came popping out of my mouth and I really don't know what I meant." He nodded his head, as if he understood me but there was no way anything I had just mumbled made any sense. If anything it had confused me more, I could only imagine what was going through his brain at the moment.

"Well, why don't we figure this all out tonight so you can get to work." I smiled at him and nodded my head. That made sense and it gave me a good six hours or so to think about what I had just suggested to him.

"Yeah. . .that, that sounds good." I stopped in front of their house and watched Matt until he was inside. "I love you, Matt." I whispered it to myself as I drove off to get this day over with as soon as possible to get back to him. Fridays always seemed to drag on and I had a feeling that today would be no different.


	8. I Just Couldn't See

Madeline

Chapter Eight - I Just Couldn't See

Lizzie

I sat across the table from Gordo watching him talk on his cell phone and trying to keep his voice down despite obviously getting upset about something. It was the first time he'd ever been interrupted in all the time we'd spent over the last week together, so I really didn't mind. I had actually started to wonder what all the celebrities were always complaining about on Entertainment Tonight if they all had the same work schedule as one of the busiest directors of the moment. It was odd seeing his name in magazines and following the advertisements of his last movie that had been released the week before we'd moved back to Hillridge. I wasn't sure if the novelty of hearing 'a film by David Gordon' would ever wear off, I could tell it hadn't for him. He still smiled and blushed a little every time he heard those words or saw some mention of him or his movies on a magazine cover in the line at the store.

"Sorry about that, somehow a lot of the footage we shot for a movie got damaged beyond repair and the studio wasn't happy about having to reschedule shooting times and having to wait longer, but they'll live." I returned his smile and we both settled back into the quiet dinner we were sharing.

"Don't worry about it, this is the first actual date I've had since the week after Homecoming, so you'd have to try pretty hard to ruin anything. Which reminds me, make sure you thank Gabriel and your mom for watching Madeline tonight."

"It was more a chance to get them off my back about getting to spend some time with mom's grandchild. They love having her around so it's not any big favor on their parts."

"Well, still it was great of them to watch her. You know, I was starting to wonder if you actually did anything other than hang out with Matt and Madeline all day, before you got that call just now."

"Well, at the moment I really don't. I was going to start production on a new movie this week, but had to make sure I was completely done with this one before committing that much time to another project. It just worked out great that I had all this time to spend with Madeline. I would have gone crazy sitting at my house all week with nothing to do." I took a few minutes to enjoy the pasta he had made for dinner before restarting the conversation.

"So directing takes up most of your time usually doesn't it? How often would I get to spend weeknights with you if you were working on a film?" I wasn't sure why I'd asked other than I really wanted to know. It didn't sound like there was very much time in his life after his career on most days. I knew there had to be a catch to falling in love with him again, nothing went perfect in my life.

"Most times I just consume myself with the project and stay in a hotel nearer to the studio or the locations we're shooting at, but that was before I had a reason to come home every night." He looked up at me and if he wanted to know my reaction to those words he had no trouble reading it on my face. My heart rang with excitement, filling with the love pouring from his eyes towards me. If this wasn't perfect, than I didn't need my life to turn out perfect, all I needed was this.

"Wh. . .what reason do you have now?" I knew the answer, it was screaming in his eyes, but I had to hear the words from his mouth.

"Well, for one there's Madeline. I don't think I could take not seeing her everyday." My heart faltered for a second, of course it would be our daughter, his daughter, that had changed his life so fast. "But for the most part I could never let another day pass by that I didn't see you to tell you that I love you."

"Gordo. . ." If there were any more words in my brain I didn't hear them and they were never spoken. All the emotions inside of me were no longer able to be held back and I gave in to the tears that began stinging my eyes. I heard his chair move away from the table and felt his arms take me into a hug, my head resting into his shoulder and my eyes wetting his shirt. I just let all the feelings from six years flow out of me then. Every thing I wanted to ever tell him and every tear I kept inside came out of my eyes over the next few minutes while he held me to his shoulder and rubbed my back.

"Lizzie. . ." I pulled away from him and looked into his eyes again. "I didn't mean to make you cry. I meant every word though, I love you more and more every day. I've spent six years hoping for just one chance to see you again and I've gotten a chance to see you every day for the rest of my life and I'm not going to let that pass me by, not this time." My tears stopped along with my heart at his words. I wasn't sure if he was meaning what it sounded like he was meaning until he turned my chair away from the table and knelt down in front of me.

"Gordo, what are you doing?"

"Lizzie, I've only had you back in my life for about two weeks but I know that I can't see another week of my life ever being spent without you in it. All I've ever wanted since we were in junior high was to spend my life with you. To know that every morning I wake up I'll see your face and every night I fall asleep, I'll be next to you. There's only two things missing in my life right now and they are the two I need and want the most." I was still holding my breath waiting for him to actually say the words, and slightly hoping he wouldn't. I wasn't ready to answer this question, I knew it was what I wanted too, but I hadn't thought it would happen so soon.

"Elizabeth McGuire, will you marry me?"

I tried to answer him, to let the screaming yes in my brain be heard out loud but no words came out. I sat there staring at his hands holding mine until the silence was near smothering us. All I could accomplish was to start crying again.

"Lizzie, I. . .I hope those are tears of speechless joy. I'm not sure what to do here."

"Just hold me." I wanted to say so much more, but the tears were choking off my voice and they weren't stopping any time soon. I sat down on the ground with him and returned my head to his shoulder where it stayed for a long time while he held me and gently rocked me in his arms, stroking my hair until I stopped crying. After about an hour of sitting there Gordo spoke into the quiet, newly furnished dining room.

"You haven't answered me yet."

"Gordo, I. . .I can't. I have to think about everything first." I felt his body go limp in my arms before tensing up. "I want everything you want and I only want it with you, I just have to make sure I'm saying yes for the right reasons."

"Bullshit. Don't give me that, it's crap and you know it. The only reason you're not saying yes now is that you're afraid. I'm just not completely sure of what you're afraid of, although I've got a guess."

I pulled away from him, realizing just how much he really knew me, even after so long. "And just what do you think I'm afraid of."

"You don't want to end up like your parents." I was about to let him know how stupid that was when the words really sunk in. Was that the reason why I couldn't just say yes to him now and that I was looking for a reason to say no? How could I not worry about that though, they had been so in love and still they'd ended up apart. I didn't want that for me and Gordo. I didn't want that for Madeline, it would be better if we just stayed friends and she never had to know what it's like to have two parents together, only to have them split back apart when she got older.

"Of course I don't want to end up like my parents, I could never do that to you or Madeline. I love you too much and I need you too much to risk destroying what we have because we fall out of love. It's easier to never have it than to try to live again after losing you that way."

"Lizzie, we love each other too much to ever let something like that happen. There's no way I could ever fall out of love with you. I'm going to love you for the rest of my life, but I understand you're scared. It scares me to think about actually having the life I've always dreamed about. I don't know if I'm ready for a family, but I know there's nothing in this world I want more than to become one with you and our daughter."

The fears in my heart began to release their hold as it melted under his words and his sincere gaze that was penetrating me to my soul. Despite all the what ifs and worries in my mind, I knew this was what I wanted and that we weren't my parents. We were in love and I'd be a fool to let anything keep us from embracing that love for the rest of our lives. "Gordo, I want this more than anything. But, I still need to get through a lot of things in my own mind before I can tell you yes without a doubt. I hope that's not asking too much out of you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I just need some time to get my mind around the idea."

"If that's the best I'm gonna get then I'll take it. I know I dropped this on you really sudden and you probably weren't ready for this, but truth is I wasn't really ready for it myself. I don't even have a ring to give you, so I guess it's good I get a second go at getting it right." I let him pull me back against his body and enjoyed the warmth it offered me as I rested my head against his chest.

I felt his breath on the top of my head, followed by the press of his lips placing a kiss. "Thank you for understanding." I whispered the words into his chest and was slightly surprised when he answered, not knowing he'd been able to hear me.

"Anytime McGuire, I've got your back, remember?"

"Always." I turned my face up to his and leaned into the kiss he was offering. I could feel the need for more rising in my chest, fueled by the passion and emotions from the night. I got up on my hands and knees, pushing him back to the floor and crawled on top of him. I gave into every desire that cried out inside of me, my hands exploring the body I had missed for so long. My lips kissing every inch of exposed skin, his hands revealing more and more as he removed his clothing and then started on mine. We were both completely naked before we stopped for a breath.

"You sure you want to do this?" I only nodded in response and placed my lips on his chest leaving a trail of kisses down to his waist before crawling back on top of him and letting him roll us over. We held each other tightly as we found a comfortable rhythm and made love for the first time in six years.

"Lizzie, wake up." I slowly drifted into consciousness and focused on the beautiful sight before me. "Gab just called to let us know she's bringing Madeline home so I think it would be a good idea if we weren't both laying naked in the middle of the floor when they get here."

Although the last thing I wanted to do at that moment was cover him up and get dressed myself, I pulled my clothes on slowly from the pile next to us and just sat and watched him struggle with the buttons on his shirt until there was a knock at the door. I got up and left him where he was sitting and answered the door to let Madeline and Gabriel inside.

"Thank you so much for watching her tonight, I owe you one."

"There's no need for that dear, she is just a delight to have around. You can leave her with me anytime you need to, especially Friday nights." I returned the woman's hug and closed the door after she had gotten in her car and waved goodbye as she drove back to Gordo's house.

"Mommy, where's uncle Matt? I have something to show him!"

"He's with Miranda baby, and you need to be getting to bed. It's after ten and way past your bed time." I scooped up my daughter and headed towards her room but stopped when I heard steps behind me. Gordo caught up to me and started tickling Madeline in my arms.

"Hey! No fair, mommy's holding me!" I turned my head away from the screaming child in my arms and kicked my foot at Gordo.

"You get her all wound up and you can put her to bed." I placed her on the floor and left them standing there. "She knows everything she's supposed to do to get ready for bed, just help her reach things. Her night shirts are in the top drawer to the left." I went into the dining room and began clearing the table. I was half way through washing the dishes when Gordo came into the kitchen and yawned before wrapping his arms around me from behind.

"I was going to get those." He kissed my neck and moved up to my cheek.

"Well you obviously were an only child growing up. Who ever cooks never cleans." I giggled when his tongue lightly tickled me just below my jaw. "Now stop that, I have to get these finished."

"I can think of a few things that are much more fun to do with your hands." He breathed into my ear.

"I bet you can, but slow down there, we are no longer alone in the house and small children have a gift for sneaking up behind you when you think they're in bed asleep." I laughed when he spun around, expecting to see Madeline in the doorway. "Why don't you go wait for me in the living room, I'm almost done in here."

He placed a kiss on my lips and left the room with a quick, "okay". I finished the last of the pans and left them to dry on the counter. I found him asleep on the couch when I walked in to the living room and laid a blanket over him before going to my own room to sleep in an actual bed.

I laid staring at the ceiling for a few hours, letting everything that had happened that evening replay in my mind. The words he had spoke last kept running over and over again through my thoughts, "I don't know if I'm ready for a family, but I know there's nothing in this world I want more than to become one with you and our daughter." As sleep reclaimed me I realized that there was nothing else in this world I wanted either. It was time for me, Gordo, and Madeline to become a family. It was long past time.


	9. Your Lonely Face

Madeline

Chapter Nine - Your Lonely Face

Matt

I opened the front door of the house and rushed in, a million apologies for Lizzie in my mouth. When I walked into the kitchen I was surprised to find Gordo leaning against the counter and drinking a cup of coffee.

"Morning."

"Hey. Um, where's Lizzie?"

"She already left for work a few hours ago and left Madeline with me."

"Oh, thanks for coming over so early man, she would have killed me if I made her late for work."

"Well, it was no problem since I never left last night. . ." I stared at him for a while, trying to figure out just what that meant. "I slept on the couch, nothing happened. . .after Madeline got home."

"You know, as your friend I want all the details, but the fact that the details are my sister I'm going to have to pass. But, I'm glad things are good for you two." I reached around him and grabbed my favorite mug from next to the coffee machine and poured myself some and started drinking it black. College has a way of teaching a person the goodness of black coffee.

"I asked her to marry me." I nearly decorated the room with splatters of coffee but managed to only dribble it down the front of me. It was too early in the morning for a surprise like that.

"You, you what?"

"I asked Lizzie to marry me."

"What did she say?" I asked him after standing in silence for a few moments.

"Well, she said no, for right now." I wasn't sure if I should be happy or sad for him. He got a yes, just a yes he'd have to wait for.

"Oh. You know what's kind of weird? I think Miranda asked me this morning to move in with her."

Gordo gave me a look and raised his eyebrow. "You think? That's great. We both have a possible great thing happening in our lives, we're just not sure if or when they're going to happen."

I returned his smile and the small laughter that followed. "Well, seriously, the only thing that would keep me from actually moving in with her would be leaving Madeline and Lizzie alone, so you might have just made everything easier for me."

"Slow down Matt, she's still needing time to think it all through. She's afraid because of all the shit your parents have put you guys and themselves through. Plus, you know Lizzie will want a real nice wedding and those take time to plan out. You're still looking at months." I didn't like the thought of waiting anymore. If Miranda figured out what she wanted and she asked me tonight I really didn't see myself waiting very patiently.

"Of course, if Miranda were to move in here then there'd be no problems." I liked the sound of the idea as it left my lips. It made the most sense anyway, I mean, why move into a smaller apartment when we could have a house.

"That would work out good. There's that extra room and everything too."

Now it was my turn to give the weird look. "Gordo, I was thinking Miranda would be in the same room with me. Makes the whole making love thing a lot easier."

"You can't share a bed with her. You have to think about Madeline and I'm not really up for trying to explain that to her yet. You'll confuse her if she sees you two coming out of the same room every morning."

"Oh." This was one of those times when having a young niece was a big problem. I really hadn't even thought of all that. "Well, I still have a lot to work out in my head. It's not like I've put much thought into this. She just dropped the possibility on me like halfa minuteago so this is all new thinking for me."

"I didn't mean to tell you how you're going to live your life or anything. I just wanted you to take my daughter into consideration. Honestly, in the end it's up to you and Miranda, but the first time Madeline asks me a question about it I'm sending her to you."

I smiled and nodded at him as I reached over and poured myself some more coffee. "Now I know Lizzie didn't make this coffee because I actually want more than one cup, so I'm guessing I should send my compliments to you."

"Yep. Lizzie said about the same thing in regards to your coffee making abilities though, so I think the sooner I get into this family the better. How have you survived through college without good coffee?"

"Hey, I can make a good pot of the stuff, Lizzie just doesn't know what it's supposed to taste like when it's not disgusting." I acted as offended as possible, but the truth was that neither my sister nor I seemed able to properly work a coffee machine.

"Uncle Matt!" I barely had time to register the voice of my niece before her arms were wrapped around my legs in a hug. "I have something to show you that I learned!"

I bent down to eye level with the small girl and smiled as enthusiastically as I could before ten a.m. "What's that sweetie?"

"This." She placed her lips on my cheek and then proceeded to blow out all the air in her lungs as hard as possible and leave a nice wet spot behind on my face when she pulled away. "It's a zer. . .zer. . ."

"Zerbert." Gordo finished the word for her through his laughing. "I see my mom and Gabby were teaching you all kinds of fun stuff last night, huh?"

Through her giggles, Madeline nodded her little head yes. "Do you want one daddy?"

"I'd love one." Gordo bent over and picked her up. I saw the tears in his eyes before he dissolved into laughter while Madeline did her best. My heart ached slightly as I realized again all the things that were about to change in my life. I was both ready to ease into a life with Miranda and stay right where I was with Lizzie and Madeline at the same time. "You okay, Matt?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. I was just thinking about stuff, sorry." I stood up and smiled reassuringly at him.

"So what's on the agenda for today? You got any of these supposed celebrities that you know showing up?"

"Actually I do, I'm meeting John Williams later this afternoon to go over what he's written for the soundtrack of my nearly finished movie. I was thinking of bringing Madeline along to meet him, he loves kids, so you would actually be a help if you came along."

"That's it? The soundtrack guy? Wow Gordo, don't spoil me here by dropping big names or anything." I laid the sarcasm on thick, hoping he would notmiss a single bit of it.

"Fine, but I was thinking you might want to slip him a copy of that demo you played me earlier this week."

"Gordo, we both know there was nothing on that demo that would interest a conductor of some of the best movie themes of all time."

"Ha! I knew you were a fan. Everyone loves his stuff. But, honestly he may not be the biggest record producer in the world but he definitely knows the ones who are." This really sounded like a bad idea to me. Tagging along with Gordo and dropping a demo of a band that may never want to speak to me again after I just left them without warning into the lap of someone so well known in music sounded just stupid.

"I can't, I'd feel like I was taking advantage of you or something."

"It's the way the game is played my friend. Come on, what do you have to lose?"

I looked him hard in the eye for a long while before finally giving in. "Okay, I'll do it. You know if you were that persistent with Lizzie you'd be married by next week." I left the kitchen and headed to my room. I had to get around for the day since Madeline was up and I had some hard phone calls to make. This still felt like a bad idea, but Gordo was right. I had nothing to lose.

A/N - I'm not sure when Gordo learned about Matt's demo. I think that got lost somewhere when I took this down or something, I don't know. You know, as I'm reading through this and editing, I have come to realize that I really liked this story, no wonder I actually finished it and began a sequel.


	10. Your Lonely Eyes

Madeline

Chapter Ten - Your Lonely Eyes

Miranda

I barely took notice of my surroundings as I drove to work after dropping Matt off at his house. My brain was spinning, doing it's best to grasp the question my mouth had just shout out for all the world to hear, well Matt and myself at least. We were going to talk about it later tonight. That was where I let it be left, talking about it later. Wasn't the whole fear driving this based on not wanting to wait ever again? There were two fears raging inside of me at that moment, one was that this was actually going to happen and destroy us and the other was that us moving in together would work out great and we'd be together for the rest of our lives.

I knew without a doubt that there was no other person for me than Matt. Even friendly dates had seemed too awkward and wrong every time I had tried over the last six years. I knew I loved Matt and that he loved me, but what I didn't know was what that love really amounted to. I hoped with all of my heart that it was forever and he'd already told me he hoped for the same, but we'd said those same words six years ago and it hadn't added up to anything but the will to wait for him to find me again.

In my heart I knew the single fear that was the root of any doubts in my head was that I was afraid of being left alone again and I couldn't take that a second time in one life. What if we moved in and everything was great but he had to leave and finish school somewhere for a year? With that question, the what if game began and it preoccupied my mind through a half hour of traffic and long after I had parked my car and walked into my office building. I was almost out of what ifs and about to begin answering them when my boss walked in to my office and raised an eyebrow at me.

"Working hard?"

"Huh? Oh, sorry. Have a lot on my mind I guess."

"I'd call it more than a guess. I don't think I've ever caught you in here staring off into thin air. There's not anything serious going on is there?" I smiled at him and shook my head at the way he always seemed to take on a fatherly role with me. It was not a rare thing for new employees to actually assume that I was his daughter, but they were always quickly corrected by me. I hated anyone thinking I had my job because my daddy owned the company, but it didn't hurt that my daddy was old friends with the man who did.

"Phillip, I'm not your best friends little daughter anymore. You don't have to look out for me, I can take care of myself now and then." He smiled as I rolled my eyes.

"Hey, if I don't ask and your father finds something out before I've given him fair warning, then I never hear the end of it. Not to mention that any time your mother gets upset with me over something I'm banned from her cooking and you know how addicting that stuff is." He sat down in the chair facing me across the desk. "But mostly you're the daughter I never had and I can't help but worry."

"Phil, you have six children, four of them daughters." I looked blankly at him, shaking my head again.

"Yeah, but none of them are you, so you're still the daughter I never had." He stood back up from the chair and moved to the still opened door of my office. "The real reason I dropped by was to remind you that you've got the presentation for today's meeting and to make sure that you actually _do _have it."

"Have I ever let you down in three years? Even when I was balancing my Senior year of College with this job I was always prepared. Don't worry." He held up his hands in a submissive gesture and backed out into the hall, leaving with a small wave and a smile. I waited a few more seconds to make sure he was gone and then I sprang into action. I had a presentation to throw together in two hours and I didn't even have the slightest clue what it was even over. I knew Matt had definitely become a distraction lately, I just hadn't realized how much of one.

VvVvV

I was in the middle of working up note cards for my speech when Phil returned to my office accompanied by Jennifer, the woman I trusted most and was closest with in the office. She was also the only person senior to me after Philip. I could tell by the look on his face that he'd pulled something over on me. It had been a good two years since that face looked my way, I had learned fast after my first year to always double check anything he said to make sure I didn't end up doing more work than needed.

"Miranda, have you got everything ready?"

I looked at him and cautiously answered with a nod. "Yeah, why?"

"Because I'll need to look over everything before presenting it, being that it's my turn to pitch the ideas to the clients today, but thanks for getting it all done for me. I was starting to get worried that I couldn't fool anyone in this office into doing my work for me anymore."

"Phil! Do you have any idea what I've just been doing!"

"Well, it resembled a headless chicken." Jennifer finally spoke as she moved around him and sat down in the chair he'd been in earlier. "Which means that Phil was right, something's got you more distracted than either one of us has ever seen you."

"Jerk, you could have just asked." I said as I looked at Phil who was starting to grin wider.

"Yeah, but rather than push I let you work it out, besides I really was hoping not to have to do all that work myself, it is why I have employees. Now, I understand that it's none of my business and that you don't have to tell me what's on your mind, but I don't think I have to tell you how annoying I will be about it until you do."

I gave in quick, truth was I figured the two of them could probably help. They were both older and wiser, Phil was my dad's age and Jennifer had ten years on me. "Okay, okay, I'll spill. I don't know if I've mentioned him before but. . ."

"Not Matt again?" They both interrupted me at the same time. "If the next words out of your mouth don't involve him moving back here and taking up all your time being together than I don't want to hear it." I blushed as Jennifer spoke.

"Actually, he did move back and we have been spending most of our free time together." I had them both stunned, neither had apparently figured on this eventuality ever taking place. "But that's not the problem, in fact that's all going great. What's bothering me today is that this morning I basically asked him to move in with me."

"This morning?" The dad face was back on Phil as he slightly cocked his head and squinted at me.

"Oh, shut up _grandpa_. You don't have to do anything at night for there to be a morning." Jennifer said before turning to face me and asking, "Now what do you mean by basically?"

"Well, I didn't actually say the words 'move in' but we're going to talk about it more tonight when I get home from work and he's free from watching Madeline."

"Okay, wait. Now who's Madeline and when did he even get back."

"Why don't I just start from the day I got back from that last out of town trip I took to snag that big account in D.C." I was in the middle of retelling everything that had happened and filling them in on who everyone was when Cindy, Phil's secretary walked into the room to tell us our clients had arrived.

"We are all three going to lunch after we bag these guys and you're finishing this and then telling us how in the world you got to moving in together in two weeks time." Phil whispered to us both as he read over the presentation walking down the hall. "And you're giving this thing because I have no idea what any of these cards say, you wrote them all in Spanish." He handed them back to me as we walked into the room and shook hands with what I hoped were the representatives of the company I had prepared for.

VvVvV

We were sitting around a table a few hours later waiting for our lunch when I couldn't take their stares any longer. "Okay, I'll finish with the story! You guys really could have helped me keep my concentration in that meeting by not giving me those annoying stares of yours the whole time."

"What stares? Do we have stares Jennifer?"

"I wasn't aware of any special stares, but Miranda is the expert people reader, so maybe she sees something in our eyes that we don't even know is there." I rolled my eyes at their sarcasm and choose to just ignore it.

"Anyway, I believe I was at waking up late this morning. . ."

"Beside him." Jennifer interrupted and finished the thought.

"Fully clothed after a night of absolutely nothing happening." Phil added with a wink.

"Right, well after we rushed around and were driving to his house I blurt out 'You know, if you wanted to just stay at my place, Lizzie could drop off Madeline on her way to work and you wouldn't have to run all the way back every morning.'" I told them the rest of what happened and finished to find a smile on Jennifer's face and a confused look on Phil's.

"So, neither one of you actually said the words, move in?"

"She already told us that, Phil. Pay attention." He looked back and forth at us both, obviously trying to figure out what he was missing. Jennifer sighed, as if being put out but smiled as she explained to him, "They didn't say the words directly, but they said them in every other way, so Miranda's trying to figure out how to actually say it tonight when they talk about it."

"Oh." We both laughed at him before their eyes and my attention were pulled behind me by my favorite sound in the world, Matt's voice.

"Hey you."

I saw Jennifer mouth 'He's cute' to me before turning around and looking into his beautiful eyes and nearly losing myself in them. "What are you doing here?" As soon as I asked I saw Gordo walking in our direction, taking Madeline's hand in his after shaking the hand of an older man with a full graying beard.

"Well, I was going to surprise you tonight with this and another idea I've come up with today, but I can't wait now."


	11. But This Is Something

Madeline

Chapter Eleven - But This Is Something

Gordo

"Gordo, I'm still not sure about this. Honestly man, this just seems too easy and what kind of sense does it make to give a great composer a demo from some nothing band that is nothing at all like what he does. Maybe if it was like some random rock star or something, but John Williams? I'm not doing this, there's no way I can do this. Should I do this?"

I looked over at Matt who was sitting next to me in my car as we drove down the highway on our way to my lunch meeting and felt the urge to give him a good slap. Having worries and cold feet was one thing, but to have to listen to him go back and forth over the same five lines of dialogue for the last four hours was driving me insane. "I told you, John is great about this sort of thing. He just passes it on to people he thinks would be interested in it and just because he conducts orchestras doesn't mean the man never listens to the radio. Can you stand to listen to only one type of music all the time?"

"I guess not, but still. . .it's not even that good."

"Just stop, I've already told you the many ways that demo is good and I'm not going to do it again. You can either take the chance or not, it's up to you." I looked into my rearview mirror again at Madeline and smiled at her angelic face as it slept in the backseat. "We're almost there, so I'd make up my mind quick if I were you." He turned and looked out the window. I didn't say anything else to him until we had parked and I was gently waking Madeline up to go inside.

"You might want to come inside."

"Huh?" He looked around and seemed actually surprised that he was sitting in a parking lot, surrounded by cars. "Oh, right. Hey Gordo?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't let me not do this okay? I'll regret it forever if I don't."

"Yeah, I know. That's why I wouldn't have anyway. You really think I was going to leave it up to you?" I smiled as he laughed. He got out of the car and walked around to where I was standing with the newly awakened and only half conscious Madeline.

"I guess you need to learn where work ends and life begins, cause the first time you direct Lizzie's life for her, well, I wouldn't trade places with you for anything." I rolled my eyes at him and we headed for the door of the slightly crowded looking restaurant. "Not as fancy as I'd imagined. Aren't you a celebrity or something now, you're supposed to be above eating where everybody else can afford to pay for a lunch."

"I must have skipped that page in the handbook they passed out at the Oscars along with the awards." I threw him a slightly annoyed look with the words.

"Wait, when did you win on Oscar? I only knew about the AFI thingy, and they really hand out a handbook?"

"Matt, seriously? I mean, I know I could have used _more _sarcasm, but I thought it would be over the top. I wasn't even nominated for an Oscar, but no they don't really hand out books on how to be a celebrity. You watch way too much Entertainment Tonight."

"Sorry, I'm just nervous about this whole meeting someone famous and giving them something I've created. It's a little overwhelming."

"I know, trust me." We walked inside and I told the hostess my name and that we were supposed to be meeting someone. I followed her with Madeline in my arms and Matt following close behind me. I glanced over at our reflection in a long mirror stretching across most of the wall to our side and noticed Matt looked very uncomfortable and out of place. He really looked about ready to just run for his life any second and I understood the feeling. It was the same one I had been suppressing at every party I'd been forced to go to by producers and various studio execs, it was the feeling rising up inside me even now as I saw the familiar bearded face rising with a smile to greet me from the table we were standing in front of.

"David, it's great to see you again! And this must be the daughter you mentioned would be joining us today, Madeline wasn't it?"

"How did you know my name? Are you Santa?" I heard Matt snort behind me as he tried to hold his laughter in. It was hard for me to keep from doing the same.

"No, I'm not Santa, although my grand daughter asked me the same thing when she saw me for the first time with my beard." He smiled wide and shook her tiny hand before turning his attention back to me.

"Yes, this is Madeline my daughter, and this is Matt McGuire a good friend of mine and Madeline's uncle."

"Ahh, the crowd control." He shook Matt's hand before gesturing for us to sit down at the table. Madeline jumped into the seat next to him from my arms before either me or Matt could even move to a seat.

"So you're a grandpa. That's almost as good as Santa, because my bestest friend in the world at school," She paused for a deep breath, "She said her grandpa always gives her presents."

"Madeline. . ." I tried to use my best warning tone as I sat down across from her at the table and Matt sat beside her, facing Mr. Williams.

"Actually, I did bring something for her." He turned to face my daughter as he pulled a few action figures from his jacket pockets. "Do you like Star Wars, Madeline?" Her eyes lit up as she took the representations of various characters from his hands and began to play with them.

"Yeah, Uncle Matt watches it with me sometimes!"

"Thank you. You didn't have to do that for her."

"No problem at all. Lucas sends me those things by the box full for my grandchildren." The waiter arrived and took our drink orders, which took a few minutes after Matt tried to play it safe by ordering water and then had to have the differences between their various choices explained to him. John got a kick out of it and told us how his son-in-law had done the very same thing the first time they'd gone to an 'overly done up place' as the guy had called it.

We spent the fifteen minutes after ordering our food trading small talk, industry rumors and secrets, and discussing various likes and dislikes of new movies. Only after we had been working on our meals for a few minutes did he turn the conversation to the reason we were there.

"Now, I believe I've gotten all the emotions we discussed for each scene pretty much pegged. I forgot to ask you if you were going to use any songs on top of the score so I could make sure there was some cohesive movement between the two from various scenes."

"Originally, I hadn't planned on it. But, I came across a song by an independent band that really seems to fit the theme of the movie. I'm not planning on a full soundtrack of songs though, just this one as a main theme and possibly one or two others if they fit the scenes as good as I think they will in my head."

"Independent is usually a good move, do you have a copy of the song by any chance?" I turned and looked at Matt who was frozen in mid bite.

"Actually, I believe Matt does. It was written by him and performed by his band." He put the fork down on his plate and looked at me first before slowly turning his gaze to Mr. Williams.

"Um, yeah. I. . .uh. . .I've got it here, but I'm not sure which song specifically he's talking about." He shakily passed the CD across the table to the other man. "That's our entire demo so there's fifteen different songs, you never know which one the right person will here and like, so we put as many as we thought were good down." His face turned back down to his plate.

"I was thinking of using song number four, it's a nice simple acoustic song that I think spells out the next to last scene we were having trouble getting a feel for what emotion was needed." I jumped in for Matt, allowing him the chance to breathe.

"Good, good. I was still having some difficulty with that movement. I'll give this a listen to and pass the rest of it on, if you don't mind. Although you might want to think of releasing it as the theme for David's new movie and let them hunt you down once they hear something they like. If he picks out his songs like he does scripts, I'm sure this song is going to get some attention once it's where it can be heard."

"Thank you, sir. I hadn't thought about doing that."

"It would give you a better position to work from if a few of them want to sign you on to their label, creates competition, and please don't call me sir. I prefer John once I know you."

"Right, sorry s. . .John." Matt looked about ready to float through the ceiling. He looked at me with as big a smile as I'd seen on him ever and said, "I can't wait to tell Miranda tonight. This on top of the whole idea on how to make moving in together work out for everyone is almost too much to hold in."

"Uncle Matt, I need to tell you something." We all looked over to see Madeline gesturing him over to her with her tiny fingers. Once he had bent down to where his ear was close to her head, she loudly whispered, "I have to go potty."

Without losing any of the smile or beaming look on his face he took her hand and lead her to the bathrooms after finding someone to ask where they were. "He's really good with her, I hope I get to be that good at this parenting thing someday." I hadn't really meant to think out loud and was slightly surprised when John answered.

"Our jobs do ask a lot of time spent away from family, don't they. Sometimes, my wife will be talking about some special event in one of our child's lives and I'll be reminded of yet another memory I'll never get to have with them. It's almost like I wasn't around for most of their lives, even though I was physically there." To me those words meant more than he could have imagined. While he had at least gotten the knowledge that they'd existed as he was missing the chances, I hadn't even had that. I missed her first words, her first steps, and any number of other things and I didn't even get to know I was missing them. I wasn't sure which would be worse, I only knew I didn't want to miss another thing in her life.

"Yeah. . ." I looked away from our table and was scanning the room when I caught sight of Miranda entering with two people I remembered from her office Christmas parties that she always drug me to so she wouldn't be alone.

"Well, David, here is some basic arrangements of the score." I turned back to take the CD being offered me. "I titled them the same as the corresponding scenes so you could play them back and see how they fit with what you were thinking."

"I'll do that tomorrow. I have to go in and reschedule some shooting dates thanks to some sloppy work by someone handling the film. For now on I'm shooting everything in digital format. It's just easier." I stood up and shook his hand as Madeline and Matt returned to the table.

"Matt, Miranda just walked in a few minutes ago with some friends from work." I nodded in her direction.

"Really? I can't lose today! Thanks again Mr. Williams." Matt hurriedly shook his hand and walked off towards Miranda.

"Let me know if everything works out fine with the score so I can arrange the recording time with the orchestra." He bent down to eye level with Madeline. "It was nice to meet you, maybe next time your dad and I have a meeting I can bring some of my grandchildren along so you'll have someone to play with. I think their about your age."

"They're five too?" He smiled and stood up, once again taking my hand in a shake.

"Thanks again John. I'll get back to you by Monday on everything."

"Sounds fine, David. Just don't forget to take advantage of these down times between busy shooting schedules to make some memories."

"I won't, thanks." I turned and took Madeline's hand in mine and her newly acquired toys in the other before following in Matt's direction. Miranda waved at me and looked surprised to see us, understandable since we were a good little while from Hillridge.

I walked up to the table as she started the introductions. "Phil and Jennifer, I'd like you to meet Matt McGuire, David Gordon, and Madeline. Guys, this is Phillip King and Jennifer Lounger." A chorus of nice to meet yous and good to see you agains went around the table along with shaking hands and smiles. "Now Matt, what is it that you can't wait to tell me about?"

"Can we go outside and talk in private actually?"

"If it's about the moving in together thing, don't be shy around us." I watched Miranda give the Jennifer woman her best death glare and I stifled a laugh.

"Oh, you told them? Well, okay then." He seemed unsure if it was a good or bad thing and just let it go as he sat down next to her, leaving me and Madeline standing beside the table.

I was about to tell him we'd be waiting out in the car when someone at the table next to theirs said, "Hey, aren't you David Gordon? The director who won that award?" I sighed internally and prepared myself to be overly nice to some guy who didn't really care about me beyond saying he'd meet me in a restaurant and I would prefer that be a good story, not a classic snob celebrity blow off tale. I shook the man's hand and answered his few questions along with the other people at his table.

When I looked back, Matt was standing up from the table. "You ready to go Gordo?"

"As soon as you are." I reached down to take Madeline's hand but didn't see her when I looked around after her hand didn't take mine. "Where's Madeline?"

Matt looked up from saying goodbye to Miranda quickly and began scanning the room. I could feel worry rising inside me when neither of us spotted her right away. I had started walking towards the front door when I heard a car horn outside followed by screeching tires. For a moment I froze and couldn't move until Matt bumped me as he flew by on his way to the door.


	12. You Can't Disguise

Madeline

Chapter Twelve - You Can't Disguise

Matt

I was kneeling beside Madeline, already holding her in a hug when Gordo came flying out the door behind me in a near panic. When he saw the slightly confused, but otherwise okay girl in my arms, the amount of relief going through his body was easily seen as he quickly strode over to the two of us.

"Madeline, oh my God, you're okay!" He took her from my arms and held her tightly in his own embrace then pulled away, holding on to her shoulders. "What the hell were you thinking! You can't just run off like that, you could have been hurt, baby. Why did you come outside, what were you thinking?"

"Gordo, stop. You just asked a five year old to explain to you why she slipped away unnoticed while the two adults in charge of her were preoccupied with other things." I stepped in on my niece's behalf, I wanted to yell at her too for scaring me like that, but it would only scare her and get her upset for something that was our fault anyway. I could already see her little face scrunching up with tears as her bottom lip started pushing out. "She doesn't know any better, she's still figuring all this stuff out."

At this point she was crying and Gordo forgot any other feelings as he pulled her into his arms and stood up, comforting his daughter and throwing me an apologetic and helpless look. "Look, we'll be in the car when you get finished talking with Miranda, okay?"

"Yeah, and Gordo. . .it's okay to get upset and scared to death, just know she still doesn't understand really why you're angry at her, just that you are." He nodded and turned with her towards the car. I went back inside and let Miranda know everything was alright.

"So she wasn't anywhere near the car horn?" Jennifer asked after I'd told them all the details.

"Nope, it was just some guy honking to get the cars in front of him at the light moving. Still freaked me out pretty good though."

"Do you know how much Gordo would have blamed himself if anything had happened? I'm glad nothing actually did, that's for sure." I lightly hugged Miranda in a gesture of comfort and stole a quick kiss from her cheek.

"If it's okay with you, can we talk about everything we were going to talk about later and not now. I'm too shook up and we should probably get Madeline home soon anyway."

"Yeah Matt, that's probably best. Why don't I come over after work and you can tell me everything you were so excited about that you couldn't keep it in before."

"Great, I'll see you then. Hope your day doesn't drag by slowly as I know mine will waiting for you." I stood up and kissed her forehead before leaving the table and the restaurant behind. I got out to the parking lot and found Gordo in the backseat of the car still holding Madeline. I got in the driver's seat, easily getting the unspoken request, and drove the three of us home in silence.

VvVvV

Hours later, the soft sounds of Madeline's laughter was drifting into my bedroom from the living room where she was watching some movie with Gordo. I was staring at my ceiling, trying to come up with the best arguments for Miranda moving in here with us, rather than me moving out with her. I wasn't sure what she'd really think about the whole idea, let alone if I really wanted to be in separate rooms when we could share the same bed at her place. There was also the fact that she'd be giving up her own place in exchange for a house with a five year old and three other adults, once Lizzie and Gordo got married. I really had trouble seeing that as anything but a loosing trade for Miranda. I sprang to my feet when I heard the doorbell ring and dashed to answer the door, feeling about as young as I had actually been the last time I'd run like this to answer the door for her.

"Hey Matt." I'm not sure if she'd come up with more words than that because she was unable to articulate anything she said after them when I pulled her lips into a deep kiss. "Okay. . .what was that for? Not that I'm actually complaining about it, but. . ."

"I missed you." I said simply with a playful grin.

"Well maybe I should make you miss me more often, if that's what I get out of the deal." We started walking further into the house, out of the entry way.

"You could, but I come up with much more. . .fun things when I have time to try them out on you."

"Hey, there are innocent ears in this living room!" Gordo called out as we entered the room he was in with Madeline.

"Yeah, and we should be careful what we say around Madeline too."

"Sorry Gordo, didn't mean to expose you to new ideas before you're ready."

"You two make a dangerous combo." He turned his attention away from the television. "So, what have you guys got planned?"

"Nothing that I know of, other than Matt getting around to telling me what I've been waiting all afternoon to hear." She jokingly glared at me. "Why, you got some amazing evening planned for you and Lizzie and need free childcare?"

"Actually, no, I was just curious." Gordo looked back at the screen, but was obviously lost in thought and not taking in the images. We sat there for a few minutes in silence, resting in our own worlds when he asked us a question in a voice just above a whisper, "How could I ever think I was ready for this?"

"For what?" Miranda asked him cautiously, almost as if she were afraid of what her friend might say.

"For taking on the responsibility of a family." Neither of us knew where to go from there so we sat in silence and waited to see if he would continue on his own. Before he started talking again, Miranda's hand reached over and took mine in a tight grip. Gordo looked up at her and smiled.

"Don't worry, I'm not thinking of running away or taking back my proposal. I'm just getting my first real taste of what my life will become and I can't believe how easy I thought it would be to just make Lizzie and Madeline a part of my life."

"It ain't easy, I can tell you that. But it's always worth it." I sent a smile with my words and felt a little pain seep in with the memories that had begun to replay in my mind. It wasn't a pain of regret or remembering how hard it had gotten sometimes trying to raise a baby, work, go to school, and have some kind of a life; it was a pain of realizing that those days were gone forever. "You know what's stupid? I actually miss the times when me and Lizzie only had enough cash to get Madeline food and we'd search for anything and everything we could find in our apartment and split it. You'd be surprised how good a half eaten snickers from Lizzie's purse can be when you've been running on empty for a day or two."

"Wow, you guys really had it rough. Did your parents know?"

I looked over at Miranda and snorted. "Not that they would have cared anyway. You wouldn't have believed the way my dad treated Lizzie once he found out she was pregnant, and even mom acted like Lizzie had committed some horrible crime to her personally. They didn't deserve to know anything and I wouldn't have taken their help unless it was strictly for Madeline anyway. I'd starve before taking their handouts."

"It's just so hard to believe. Your parents were always so supportive and everything, I just don't get what could have happened. I can see why it scares Lizzie that we'll end up the same, I mean who would have ever thought your parents wouldn't be together forever?"

"Well, they were good at creating that facade, for us all. Even me and Lizzie didn't know how bad it was until after we'd moved and it all went downhill from there. I don't know when it started falling apart, but I think it always was. Nothing crashes and burns that horribly so quickly,at least not without some major problems to begin with."

"Problems that you and Lizzie don't have." Miranda added from beside me.

"Yeah, I know all this. I just wish I could get Lizzie to see it all too."

"See all of what?" We all three jumped with surprise at the sound of the extra voice entering the room.

"Do you try to sneak in without being noticed? I swear we need a noisier door or creaky floor, or something." I watched my sister roll her eyes after I'd finished my small tirade, we went through this about everyday after she'd come home unnoticed and scare me half to death by saying 'hi'.

"Matt, why don't we go and talk in your room." Miranda said, leading me by the arm out of the room. "I think they need to talk about some stuff alone."

"Right." I waved to them both with my free hand before disappearing through my door way.

"That was real subtle."

"I wasn't going for subtle, I was going for blatantly obvious. Glad to see it worked." She wrapped her arms around my waist after shutting the door behind us. "Now, what was it you were wanting to tell me earlier." She kissed the tip of my nose, then my chin before resting her forehead against my chest.

"Which do you want first, the cool news or the cool idea."

"Just shoot 'em out, you're not cute enough for my patience to hold anymore." She pulled me closer to her body with her arms.

"Fine, I'll start with the cool news then. You know that CD you made me let you listen to last week?"

"The one of your band?"

"Yeah, well today Gordo had me pass it off to John Williams, he's a composer and knows people who might be interested in hearing us and stuff, but he also told me at lunch that he wanted to use some of the songs for the soundtrack of his next movie!"

"Matt, that's great!" She kissed me and I returned it, hard. We had somehow found our way to my bed and were soon both caught up in passionate kisses and embraces. I had her shirt half way unbuttoned when she stopped me. "Wait, what was the other thing you wanted to talk about?"

"Could you forget about there being something else for like, ten more minutes?" I looked hopefully at her, not wanting to stop what we were in the middle of, or about to be anyway.

"Matt. . ."

"Okay, okay. I was thinking this morning about what you asked me in your car."

"About that, have you thought about everything and every_one _involved in this? What about Madeline and Lizzie? And are you sure it's what you really, really want? Because I would understand if it wasn't, it's a big step and all. And there's just so many other. . ."

"Miranda, stop." She moved her eyes from the wall, back to my face. "I have thought of all those things and I am very ready to live with you, without any doubts. But there's just the one person I'm not ready to be without yet. . ."

"Madeline."

"Yeah. I'm sure it seems really weird and all, but for the past so many years she and Lizzie have been my life. That beautiful little girl has been my world and I can't see letting go of that soon." I watched her bite her lower lip in thought and I was almost hoping she would come up with the plan on her own, but she went the other direction.

"So I guess you're just not ready for this yet, it really is okay Matt. I don't think it's weird or anything at all, you love your niece and your sister and you want to make sure they're okay, I understand."

"No, I don't think you do." She gave me a half way challenging, yet hurt look before I continued. "The other thing I wanted to tell you was I came up with a plan to be able to be around you _and _Madeline as much as possible. Why don't you move in here with us?"

I waited for the question to work it's way through her brain. As the seconds of silence lengthened I began to worry that she saw how much she would be giving up and knew it wasn't worth it. I was about to retract my question when she finally answered.

"You. . .you want me to. . .Matt. . .What does Lizzie think?"

"I haven't had a chance to talk to her about it yet, but we have a spare bedroom and everything for you and. . ."

She put her finger over my lips and silenced me. "Spare bedroom? Why wouldn't I just be in here with you?" I kissed her finger before pulling it away from my mouth and answering.

"When I ran the idea by Gordo, he thought it might confuse Madeline if we both were in the same room, and I can see his point. I know it's not the normal idea of living together since we'll be more like room mates, but we will only be down the hall from each other and I can tip toe as quiet as a mouse." I smiled suggestively at her.

"Yeah, but you'd have to keep it down when you got to my room. You have this tendency to make a little more noise than necessary. . ."

"Well maybe you shouldn't make me scream like that. Seriously, who tickles their boyfriends after sex, it's just not right." She burst into laughter before trying to tickle me as we were on the bed. After about a minute of being mean to me, she stopped and sat up with a serious look on her face.

"Okay, here's what I'm thinking. I like the idea of not being in that apartment by myself anymore and it will be nice to get a chance to have more time to spend with Lizzie, but she has to be one hundred percent okay with the idea."

"Serious?" I was hesitant to believe it had been so easy to convince her.

"Serious. You have no idea how much I hate being alone. I miss the sounds of other people, and the freaky neighbors screaming at each other at three a.m. doesn't cut it." I pulled her down on top of me and kissed her deeply and fully on the mouth, slipping my tongue past her lips to brush against hers. I started to work on her shirt again after a few moments of continued kissing, this time she didn't stop me except to make sure the door was locked.

A/N-You know, I am really enjoying this story. I guessI forgot how much I loved writing it. Please let me know what you are thinking so far, especially if this is your first time reading through it. Feedback always gets me giddy and I update like thing that updates a lot when I get giddy. Oh, and because i haven't been saying it in the reposts of either of this stories, Read. Review. Enjoy! Hacen


	13. It's Not Just Me

Madeline

Chapter Thirteen - It's Not Just Me

Lizzie

I looked curiously at Gordo as Miranda led my brother out of the room leaving the two of us in the room with Madeline. "Okay. . .this has to be something big. What's going on?"

"Lizzie, first off just let me say that I don't know how in the world you ever made it with all this parenting stuff on your own. I've never been so freaked out by anything in my life as I was today when she wandered off and. . ."

"She wandered off? My God Gordo, you can't take your eyes off of a five year old! What were you thinking! And where in the world were you at for her to _wander_ _off_?" I knew the words came out way more angrier than I felt, and that he had every right to actually leave my house with his daughter, in fact I liked the idea that he was actually willing to do just that, but I was a mother after all and the irrational fear seemed to come instilled with the giving birth package.

"Lizzie, I feel horrible about it all, trust me. It scared me to death and made me think about where I stand right now in my life with all of this. You know what? I realized that there's no way I could ever be prepared or capable of being the perfect father. There are things that I'm going to do completely wrong and it might take me a few times to figure out how to do them right. I don't have the time for a family and a directing career in the perfect world. . ."

"Gordo, stop. I know all this, okay? It's why I said no to you last night. Well, one of the major reasons anyway. You are right though, I'm afraid to turn out like my parents. They hate each other, Gordo, and I could never live with hating you. It would kill me. But mostly I don't want to ruin your life by tying you down to me and Madeline. You being her father is what she needs, not us being married. Like you just said, you can't have both in a perfect world." Gordo waited until I had finished before continuing where I had interrupted him.

"Wait for a second okay? Let me finish this time." I nodded my head as he took a steadying breath. "As I was saying, I don't have the time for a family and a directing career in the perfect world that I created in my mind and that I always thought I wanted, but I've never lived in a perfect world and I'm not about to try now. Any world where I'm not with you and our daughter is no world I'm going to live in, and it's the same with directing on some levels. Only, it's what I love to do, it's not what I live for."

I could feel the warmth of tears rising to my eye lids and beginning to escape onto my eyelashes and cheeks. Gordo stepped closer to me and reached a hand to my cheek. As he brushed my tears away, I turned into his hand and kissed his palm, looking up into his eyes. I couldn't help but feel like I was seeing the answers to all my fears and worries staring back at me from his soul. There was a truth and a feeling of rightness pouring over me before we broke our gaze.

"Lizzie, I live for you. I always have and I always will. You have always been my reason for crawling out of bed, no matter how much I'd rather not face the day. Now, I have a daughter who means the world to me and I would give anything for. I've got as perfect a life as I think is possible." He leaned into me and I accepted his offered kiss, enjoying the taste of our mixing tears and tender feel of his mouth against mine. "There's only one thing that could make things better, and that's waking up next to you every morning for the rest of my life. I love you Elizabeth McGuire. Will you marry me?"

Again a flood of fears came screaming into my head as they had the last time he'd asked me those words, but this time my heart was bursting with too much love to stop and pay attention before it answered. "Yes." It was soft and simple, but my one whispered word seemed to do for him what every word he'd said over the last five minutes had done for me.

"Are you sure?" I stared at him, thinking honestly about his question before answering.

"Not at all, but there's nothing else I want more in life." We kissed again and lost ourselves to the outside world. I'm not sure how long we stood there sharing the most passionate kiss of our lives, but after a few eternities I was pulled back into my world by an insistent tugging on my pants leg. I broke our kiss, gasping for the air I had forgot to inhale and looked down at my daughter. "What is it honey?"

"What ya doing?" If I hadn't known better, I would have sworn my five year old child was being sarcastic. It almost looked as if she already knew the real answer, but wanted to hear what I would try and describe to her. Unfortunately for her, my mind froze at the thought of what I was getting myself into and what I'd just said yes to. Gordo however seemed to have all his mental capabilities intact and answered her as he picked her up.

"We were just talking about something really important, Madeline. Something that will have a big effect on you, as well as me and your mom."

"Is that how mommies and daddies talk? Eww." I smiled at my daughter's revulsion and let Gordo put everything into words for his daughter. He was getting the being a father thing down pretty fast I had to admit to myself, other than the incident today and whatever had happened.

"Sometimes, baby. But this is something important I have to tell you, are you listening?" He waited for her cautious nod before continuing. "Well, your mom and I are going to make us a real family. We're going to get married and then I'll live with you and everything."

I almost felt bad for the boy when Madeline answered. Whatever response he'd been expecting, he was definitely not prepared for her to burst into tears and ask, "You mean we're not real?" I watched the utter confusion and regret at making his daughter cry flash over his face and decided it was time to step in, being that I was a little more experienced with how to tell a five year old something as important as this.

"Madeline, honey." She looked at me as I rubbed her back, still held in Gordo's arms. "Do you remember how you, me and Uncle Matt lived in our old house? How we were a family?"

Eventually she slowly nodded yes and I plowed on. "Well, daddy's going to become a part of that family too because you and I are going to marry him in." I smiled big when she scrunched up her tiny face and looked back and forth from Gordo and me.

"I can't marry daddy! Uncle Matt said that's bad, it's in chest."

"Mads, that's incest, not in chest." My brother corrected my daughter as he happily strolled into the room and gave me a hug and a kiss before going over to the refrigerator and pulling out the orange juice, about to take a drink out of it, when he was stopped in mid movement.

"Matthew McGuire! You touch your lips to that carton and you can forget about bothering with asking Lizzie anything." Miranda saved me the words, which wouldn't have worked anyway, when she followed after him into the room and caught him just in time. I watched Matt debate the choice over in his head, the carton of orange juice held inches from his lips in the air.

"Fine! It's better out of a glass anyway, _mom_! You're just as bad as Lizzie. I bet Steven Tyler can drink out of his orange juice carton and not get grief about it. Once I'm a rock star, you can all kiss my straight from the carton drinking a. . ."

"Language." I stopped him from slipping as usual in front of Madeline. "And just when did the subject of incest come up with my daughter?"

He looked at the expressions on all three of our faces and pretended to act shocked that we didn't appear supportive of his choice in subject matter when talking with a five year old.

"What, every kid should know that stuff, it saves them from having to figure it all out the hard way later." I lowered my head, still staring at him, letting him know that hadn't explained anything at all. "Okay, gees, we were watching a very touching and moving episode of Springer and these two guys were fighting over this girl and one of them was her brother and then her dad all comes out and says that he's. . ."

Again Matt was interrupted by Miranda, and I smiled at being reminded of when we were all kids and she would jump in and defend me from anything Matt could come up with. "Matt, you let a five year old girl watch Springer, and then tried to explain to her why all those nut jobs are freaks?"

"Hey, if she'd just stayed in bed at two in the morning when they were rerunning it, then she wouldn't have been in my room watching it. Can I help it if my beautiful niece needs to be protected from her nightmares?"

"Two a.m.? You kept her up at two in the morning?" I sighed and then started to laugh at myself. As Madeline grew older, I found myself sounding more and more like my mother, well at least as she had before letting her true emotions out. "Let's just stop while my brother can still climb out of the hole he's digging." I decided that there were much worse things that my daughter could be facing in life than an uncle who lets her watch trash TV. at two in the morning, much worse.

"Thanks, Liz. That's why you will always be my favorite sister. Oh and speaking of having a question to ask you, how would you feel with Miranda moving in to that spare room we have and living with us?" I could see Gordo make the face he'd always done in preparation for me and Miranda to start screaming happily about something, and I figured I should not let him down.

"Miranda! Oh my God that would be great!" As the two of us acted like sugar high preteens hopping in place as we hugged and screamed next to our boyfriends I was again warmed by the memories it brought back, and I cursed the missed years none of us would ever get back.

"So. . .I'm guessing that is a yes then?" Miranda rolled her eyes at Matt's question.

"Nice work there Captain Obvious!" Gordo jumped into the conversation, which was still on the slippery slope of becoming an all out Matt bashing.

"Okay, that'll be enough of that. It's like when we were kids and you guys would all gang up on me. I used to cry in my room over the things you guys would say you know."

Miranda turned away from me and faced Matt again. "You mean you used to plan your revenge. The cameras never caught you crying, we would have used that against you if they had."

"The cameras. . ."

"You aren't the only one who knows how to rig a room to catch people in their most entertaining moments." We all three laughed as Matt stared in shock at Gordo.

"I can't believe. . ."

"If anyone in this room can't believe anything it's me with the way you could break dance when you thought no one could see." As Miranda spoke, Matt's eyes grew wider and his face tuned a few shades darker red than I'd ever seen it. "Seriously though, break dancing was old before you were even born McGuire, what was that all about?"

Again the three of us were laughing at my brother's expense and memories were flooding into my mind along with each fresh burst of laughter.

"Wait a minute, how often did you see me dancing, because. . ."

"Yeah, we saw that. And I have to say I'm glad you made the switch to boxers long before I ever saw you with no pants on in person. I promise that if you'd still been wearing those cute little whitie tighites our first time, I would have laughed to hard to have ever done anything."

We were reminded that our conversation was being absorb by a young mind when Madeline called out, "Whitie tighties!" and giggled in Gordo's arms. The three of us lost it again and tears began clouding my eyes as I laughed.

"Oh great, now you've even got Madeline to turn against me, I hope you're all happy. I should report you for watching a child dance in his underwear."

"Matt, take my word for it, we didn't enjoy it." Gordo said through his laughter.

"Speak for yourselves, I tried to sneak the tape home but Gordo erased it before I had a chance to." Matt stared open mouthed at his girlfriend before giving into the contagion that is laughter.


	14. You Feel It Too

Madeline

Chapter Fourteen - You Feel It Too

Miranda

After a few minutes of just plain therapeutic laughter, we had moved from the kitchen and into the living room so we could sit down. I wasn't sure about the rest of them, but with work, laughing so hard, and what Matt and I had just finished doing before coming back out here, I was near comatose. I let my body slump into the couch and into Matt's side after he sat down next to me.

"So when do we move you in, roomie?" Lizzie asked me excitedly, Madeline sitting in her lap. "How much notice do you have to give your landlord and we'll need to switch your phone and everything."

"Lizzie, slow down. Miranda is a big girl now. I think she can handle everything." Matt jumped in at the first breath and stopped his rambling sister. I smiled and started laughing at the two of them, getting that much more excited with the idea of living with them. I knew that most people seemed reluctant to give up their freedom once they got it, but the truth was I hadn't liked any of it. It was just too quiet and lonely. It was also a large part of the reason I was at Gordo's so often with his mother, she was a person to talk to and be around, well that and Gabriel was one hell of a cook.

"Well, I was hoping to get it all taken care of as soon as possible. How does the beginning of next month sound to you guys?" Lizzie looked a little disappointed that I didn't say I'd have everything moved over tomorrow. "Of course, once I get everything moved over here I'd probably have to end up being here before then."

"In that case, Matt and Gordo can get your stuff moved over here this week. It's not like they are doing anything all day anyway." I had to laugh at the faces the two guys tossed Lizzie. "Well, you don't. Matt hasn't started back to school yet and I haven't actually seen you do any work Gordo."

"Excuse me, but what do you think I was doing today? I don't make a habit of driving twenty minutes just for lunch. Besides, next week I'll be making up for all this down time, you can bet on that." Gordo sounded defensive and hurt, but his face held only a smile as he made faces at Madeline. "Plus, Matt's going to be busy next week too. He has some recording to do."

"All the songs are already done." Matt looked confused, a very cute look on him I decided, before Gordo explained.

"Yeah, but John called while you and Miranda were in your bedroom and thought an acoustic version of the last song would fit better with the overall feel of the movie and the rest of the music, plus he wants to add an orchestral arrangement to it."

"Oh, wow. . .really? That's just. . .wow!" I squeezed the stunned boy next to me and kissed his cheek excitedly. It was great to see him getting such an amazing chance and to see him getting so excited over it.

"Hey, didn't you sing the very last song Matt?" He nodded yes to his sister and I hugged him even tighter.

"The rest of the guys made me put it on there, I didn't even want to. I didn't think it was very good." We all sat in a comfortable silence, each thinking their own world of thoughts. I was proud of him and I could tell Lizzie was just as happy for her brother as I was.

Eventually the silence was broken by a single question from Lizzie that changed the entire atmosphere of the room with Matt's reaction. "Didn't you write that one about mom and dad?" I felt him tense up in my arms and raise my arms with his chest as he took a few deep breathes. I was ready for him to explode like he usually did when this subject was broached, but was relieved when he just relaxed back into my arms. "I'm sorry Matt, I didn't mean to ruin the moment, I just. . .you'd think after so many years I'd be able to catch myself before bringing them up with you."

"No, Lizzie. It's okay. I need to get over it." He paused and took a few more calming breathes. "Yes I did write it for them, well all of us really, right before they kicked you out and I never talked to them again. I rewrote some of it afterwards though when we were living in the apartment and going to school."

"Which one is it? I don't remember you playing me a song you sang." I asked as the thought occurred to me that he hadn't said anything that night he'd played the demo for me at my apartment.

"I didn't. I wasn't in the mood to deal with everything it would bring up, sorry." His head had turned into my shoulder as he spoke, muffling the last few words into his t-shirt that I had thrown on before coming out of his room.

"Don't be, I understand. But do you think you could play it for me now?" I wasn't sure why I'd asked, but at that moment there was nothing else I wanted to hear more than him singing. I wanted to be able to share the feelings the song would bring up for him, to make it okay.

"Actually, I only had the one copy that I gave to John today. Paul's sending the rest down this week, so I guess you'll have to wait until they get here."

"Or. . .you could bring out your guitar and sing it for us. I haven't heard you playing since we moved back here anyway and I've missed it."

"Yeah, that's sounds like a great idea!" I agreed with Lizzie a little too eagerly, pulling a smile from all three of them and getting Madeline as excited as me just with the tone in my voice.

"Well, I guess I need to work up an acoustic version of it anyway." Matt reluctantly pulled away from me and stood up. "I can't promise this will be any good, so don't expect much." I rolled my eyes at his back as he left the room and smiled for him when he returned carrying a guitar case. I had been trying to get him to play for me since I'd found out he could. I had always had this weakness for guitarists that I couldn't explain, but the most I'd gotten him to do was play some CD for me.

He pulled out what I assumed was an acoustic guitar, though I really had no idea what the difference would be from any other guitar. I had never really cared much beyond the guitarists to actually learn about what they were playing when I thought one was cute. He hit the chords once and then began turning the silver knobs, playing what he called the tuning song. Eventually he looked sideways at me and smiled nervously. "You sure you want me to do this? It might change your mind about moving in with me and I wouldn't blame you."

"Just play it!" I slapped his arm playfully and acted exasperated.

"Well, here goes nothing."


	15. Cause You Know

Madeline

Chapter Fifteen - Cause You Know

Matt

I sat on the couch beside Miranda holding my guitar and really doubting for the second time in one day that something was a good idea. But it worked out great the last time, so I took a steadying breathe and warned everyone in the room. "Well, here goes nothing." It felt good to feel the resistance from the strings against my pick again, Lizzie had been right, I hadn't played since we'd moved and now I was wondering exactly why. Hearing the familiar chords of the song I knew so well echoing around the room lulled me into a separate world where only the song and I existed, a world I had avoided for far too long. When the time came for the words, I nearly missed my queue I was so wrapped up in the chords. My throat seemed to resist the first few lines as I worked it around the words that had taken so much pain to write, but eventually reverted to the comfortable strain of singing.

I only spoke to you that way

To get it through your haggard brain

That I could be so much more

I could be someone that someone would adore

Seems like a long time since I felt good

Good enough to not want to cry

Do you know better now?

Well so do I

I let the words drift off as the music bridged the chorus back to the verse. I wasn't used to not having the drums or the lead guitar helping to fill in the void between words, but found the simple chords being played on the acoustic almost soothing, a contrast to the words and the emotions connected with them.

I feel so sick inside I know it's wrong

But I just can't bite my lip and go along

As the last word and chord rang out I slowly opened my eyes, surprised to find them closed and even more surprised to see Miranda staring deeply back into me eyes with unshed tears in her own.

"Wow, I can see why John called me tonight and didn't wait for me to call him on Monday. Damn."

"Gordo! Watch your mouth." Lizzie's hands were covering Madeline's ears. "But, that's what I said the first time he played it for me the first month we were on our own, after he'd left with me."

I looked at my shoes, I've never really been good with hearing comments about my music, good or bad. My head was turned to look again into the soft, tear stained face of Miranda by her trembling hand on my chin. "Why haven't you told me how much you still hold against them?"

It wasn't the question I had been expecting, but then that was why I loved her so much- she never did the expected. I thought about how to answer her question the best and most truthfully and eventually just shrugged my shoulders and sighed. "I forget sometimes how much I really hate them for everything they did to Lizzie and me. I can almost pretend that I don't sometimes, but it never lasts long. When dad actually tried to follow through with his numerous threats and told Lizzie there was no place in his house for a. . ."

"Matt, wait. I'm going to take Madeline to bed. She doesn't need to hear this, and I don't mind not reliving it." Lizzie stood and left the room with a sleepy looking five year old cradled in her arms. I waited until I heard a door gently shut and then continued.

"Well, what he said exactly isn't important. After he'd said the words, I just punched him and returned all the shit he'd been screaming at the two of us with a few kicks and screams before throwing as much of our stuff into Lizzie's car as I could and leaving them behind. I promised them that they would never have to worry about Lizzie or Madeline again and that I'd never forgive them, and I haven't."

I let Miranda take me into a fierce hug, my head going to her shoulder to hide the few tears that were escaping. I'd gotten good over the last few years with keeping my emotions hidden from everyone except Lizzie, but Miranda had a way of pulling everything out of me, no matter how buried or suppressed.

"It's all so crazy. I still can't picture the Sam and Jo we knew back then ever screaming, let alone calling Lizzie names." Gordo was staring at his hands, his voice throaty and barely above a whisper. "All I can say is you should have done more than kick the bastard a few times."

I pulled away slowly from Miranda, leaving some tears to cool her skin through my t shirt. She looked a lot better in it than I did. "Matt, I know this is all hard to talk about, really I do, I just wish you had. But, in all fairness you haven't been around very long to tell me all that's happened in the last six years. I just can't help but wish you had let me know back then so I could have done something to help."

"Yeah, me too." Gordo agreed, looking up from his hands at me.

Lizzie returned to the room looking as tired as Madeline had. "So, have you shared the wonderful tale with them?"

"The basics. I hated living through the details, so I doubt anyone would want to know them."

"You guys have been through a lot. I guess we all have really, but you two had a lot more to fight through. I'm just glad you made it home." Gordo said the last as Lizzie sat down in his lap and kissed him softly on the cheek.

"I am too. We both are." She agreed with the boy beneath her in the chair.

"I don't know about you all, but I could use a break from all the drama that has been my past. Anyone have more good news from today? We already know mine." I offered up the subject change and felt the mood lighten immediately in the room.

"Well, I landed a big account today." We all said our congratulations to Miranda. "Oh, and I saw this really cute guy at lunch. . ." I smiled at her and played along.

"Oh yeah? And just what was so cute about him?"

"I think he was in a band, and I'm sure Lizzie remembers what that does to me. . ." My sister laughed as she nodded her head. Before I could say anything else though she continued. "But then you guys showed up and chased him off before I could get his number or even talk to him."

My mouth fell slightly opened as she caught me off guard again. She reached over and shut it with a tap on the chin and a mischievous smile. "Well played Sanchez, but don't forget I know two very important things." She looked at me squinting her eyes in challenge. "I know where you live and where you are the most ticklish." I pretended to reach for her sides causing her to scream and jump up from the couch, lose her balance and end up on the floor. Once she started laughing and I knew she was okay, I joined the three best friends in their laughter.

After a few minutes of contented silence had passed Lizzie and Gordo shared a look before turning their attention to me and Miranda. "Me and Gordo have some good news too. . ."

Credit for the song goes to Aaron Sprinkle for "Sick Inside"


	16. That I Belong

Madeline

Chapter Sixteen - That I Belong

Gordo

I woke up and stared at the screaming alarm clock for a full minute before reaching over and slapping it off. Four a.m. was definitely too early for any day, let alone a Friday. I was scheduled to begin reshooting the damaged scenes today and it was just my luck that it coincided with a large number of meetings with everyone from the producers to the sound technicians who were having some troubles with the actors and their voice-overs. I was really not looking forward to my day. I suddenly missed the past two weeks of doing nothing more than being with my daughter even more when my phone began ringing before I had even sat up in bed.

"Hello?"

"Morning you, just calling to make sure you got up like you asked me too." Her voice went a long way to relieve any lingering sadness from a night alone in a hotel room. "So, this is what it will be like when you're shooting movies?"

"Pretty much, but I really only stay close to the set the entire time because I never really had a reason to be at home, but now that I do. . ." I let my thoughts trail off with my words and for a moment we both sat on the phone in silence. The picture of Lizzie, Madeline and me as a family was playing itself out beautifully in my head.

"I guess I can live with that, as long as I am Mrs. David Gordon." I smiled into the receiver and laughed lightly.

"You will be, I promised didn't I? I even got you a certain ring."

"Yes you did." She sighed heavily into the phone. "So why did I want to wait until next summer again? I mean that's like ten and a half months away from now. Matt will be done with college by then, well unless he's a rock star touring the country. Do you know how excited he's been since he spent that day recording with that orchestra?"

"Yes I do know, Miranda has asked me to hit him over the head with a bat just to shut him up more than once. But as for why you wanted to wait, you wanted time to try and get Matt okay with the idea of your mom coming to the wedding and possibly your dad. I personally am with Matt on this one though, but I love you and this is your wedding day so I want you to do whatever you feel would make it the best."

"Do you think I should forget about my dad and just concentrate on my mom? She never really did anything, although she didn't help us out at all either."

I rubbed my chin with my free hand and thought about my answer for a few heart beats before answering. "Honestly? I don't see Matt ever being okay with the idea of being in the same area as either of your parents. He really has a lot of hatred built up for them, it's pretty obvious now that I listen to his demo." She sighed again, sounding defeated. "When are you planning on letting him know your plans?"

"I actually already did. Last night after I talked to you, me and Matt got to talking and I laid out everything for him. It went about as well as I had figured it would, maybe a little better." I rubbed my forehead at her words.

"I thought we had agreed to tell him together, you know, moral support and everything. I would have felt better if I could have been there with you, but it doesn't matter now. What did he say?"

"He um, basically said that I had to choose who I wanted at the wedding more, them or him. Then he told me he had to leave before he regretted anything and just left the house. It's the only reason I was actually awake at five in the morning, I've been checking his room about every fifteen minutes when I wake up from trying to sleep." I could hear the worry in her voice for her brother and truthfully I felt the same worries creeping into my mind. "It's not like him to not call, Gordo. He's gotten pissed and left for a few hours before, but he always called from the first pay phone to let me know he would be back after he'd had time to think. I'm really worried I pushed him too far with this."

"Lizzie, I'm sure he's just fine, don't worry okay? He probably just forgot or something, he's got a lot to think through this time, it'll be okay." As I said each word, I truly hoped they were the truth and I tried to trust them. In the few weeks spending time with Matt two things had become clear, one- he was a creature of habit, if he did something more than once he would always do it without thought the exact same way; and two- he never missed or forgot a thing. It had started to get annoying how he seemed to always know exactly what Madeline was doing and where she was doing it at.

"Gordo, thanks for trying, but we both know Matt better than to think he just forgot something. The boy is a walking date book and surveillance team all in one. I wish having Madeline could have had the same effect on me, but I'd never remember anything without him to remind me. Besides, I have to worry about him, it's a big sister thing."

"Lizzie. . ."

"Hold on, I think he just came in the front door." She cut off any other words of comfort I could have found. There was silence over the line for a few minutes, eventually replaced by talking in the background. "Gordo, can I call you back?"

"Actually, I have to get going in like fifteen minutes, so why don't you just fill me in on everything later tonight okay?"

"Sounds good. Thanks."

"Anytime. I love you."

"Love you too." She barely got the words out before the line clicked dead. I hung the phone back on the receiver and headed for a quick shower before dashing on towards what would no doubt be a very long day. I opened my bag and found everything I could possibly have forgotten sealed inside plastic baggies and laying on top of my clothes with a note.

David,

You really need to pay attention when you pack, I swear you'd forget your head if it weren't attached, plus you know how your mother worries anyway.

Gabriel

I smiled at the note as I read it through another time. For yet another time in my life I wondered how I had ever gotten anything accomplished before being blessed with Gabriella. The circumstances weren't the best, but I was glad to have received such a great friend in return. I lifted my bag onto the bathroom counter and pulled out everything I would need and flipped the shower on. I sent one more wish for a quick, easy day to the open air and stepped into the too hot flow of water. Not a great way to start any day, especially at five fifteen a.m. on a Friday morning.

VvVvV

"Congratulations!" Peter Vangriel's shout greeted me as I walked into the room crammed full of every possible audio/video device known to man. "On both the kid and the engagement!"

"Thanks, Pete, but how do you know- or do I even want to know?"

"No fears my esteemed director, the tabloids haven't caught a whiff of the news yet. Mr. Williams told me all about it the other day when we were going over cut offs for dubbing in his music. That Matt guy sure has a lot of ideas running through his head. I swear the two of them together in one room was the scariest thing I've ever witnessed, and I've been to A/V technical conferences." He made a mock shiver of fright then smiled. "Hope I'll be seeing more of him around, kept John preoccupied and that's always a good thing."

I laughed at the older, balding man. "I'm sure John would love to hear about that." He pretended to act horrified at the idea of me saying anything. "Now, what's the problem your guys are having with the voice-overs?"

"My guys aren't the problem, your actors are! Let me tell you what they've been. . ." I tuned out the following complaints, I knew them all already. They were always the same. I let my mind drift to Madeline, wondering what she was doing at the moment. Being that it was two in the afternoon, I was sure she'd be up to some project with Matt, if he was feeling in any mood for it. I was pulled back to my conversation by Peter's hand waving in front of my face. "You could at least pretend to listen to the same old complaints before telling me to do what I always do."

"Sorry, Pete. I've just already had a long day with those same actors and I've still got a few meetings before I can escape. It's no reason to blow you off though, I apologize."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just get going. I'll take care of everything here, and don't worry about it. I'm sure whatever your mind was on would like for you to get back to her soon as possible, I know my kids always miss me when I'm gone on a project." I returned his smile and thanked him before leaving the room and the problems in his hands.

Now all I had to get through were a few stuffy meetings and I was checking out of my hotel and heading home. Somehow, the three hour commute seemed a lot more worth it than it ever had before.


	17. With You

Madeline

Chapter Seventeen - With You

Lizzie

I knew by the look on his face when he walked through the door that there was a lot on his mind. "Gordo, can I call you back?"

"Actually, I have to get going in like fifteen minutes, so why don't you just fill me in on everything later tonight okay?"

"Sounds good. Thanks."

"Anytime. I love you."

"Love you too." I said before hanging up the phone and giving my little brother my full attention and glare. "Do you have any idea how worried I've been?"

With a half smile, Matt looked into my eyes and answered, "Actually yeah, you probably have been getting up every twenty or so minutes and checking my bedroom, fighting the urge to call Miranda to see if I was over there."

All traces of a smile vanished from his face when he saw the hurt building in my eyes along with the anger that had already been there, hiding my worry. "So you knew I would be a wreck and figured you'd let me suffer? What were you trying to do, pay me back for having the nerve to want my mother and father to be at my wedding!"

"Actually, no. I was too busy crying like a little baby in my girlfriend's arms all night to remember to call you, but you know what? I'm glad you didn't get any sleep and that you had a bad night. I can't believe you would want. . ._them_ to be at the happiest day of your life! You really think they give a fuck about you! About any of us! Can you honestly say that you do?" I took a step backwards from him when he moved towards me while talking. It was one of the few times I had ever truly seen my brother so angry and it was the very first I had ever felt afraid of him. I knew he had it in him, I'd seen him beat our father to the ground the night we'd left that life behind, but I had never been the focus of his anger. It was why he took his walks when we fought, he didn't want me to see him like he was right now standing before me and I was grateful for all the years I had been spared this glimpse into his temper.

"Matt. . .please, calm down. You're scaring me." There must have been something in my voice or on my face that conveyed to him how serious my words were because I could see the physical release of his built up anger when he realized what he was doing and broke down, collapsing to the floor with his head in his hands.

"I'm sorry Lizzie, really I am. I promised myself I would never let you see my like that and that I would never let myself get that angry with you. It's just that I can't understand at all why you want them to be there, not after what they did to you. Dad called you a whore, Lizzie. He looked you in the eyes and said there was no room for easy little sluts who get pregnant in his house. How can you ever want to let that bastard back into your life, even if just for a day. He doesn't deserve it. Neither of them do."

"Matt, I know what he said. I was standing there and those words haunt my thoughts every time I mess something up or get frustrated. They play like a broken record in my dreams sometimes, but it was over five years ago. I have to believe that he's changed and that he may just regret what he said. I have to at least find out if he wants to come. I need to give him a chance to ask me to forgive him, Matt, or I'll never be able to truly move beyond that night." I was sitting on the floor in front of him cross legged, my hands on his knees to make sure I had his attention for my next words. "And neither will you."

"Maybe I don't want to. Have you ever thought about that?" His voice was flat and calm, a direct contrast to the near shouting tone he'd been using moments before. All anger and emotion was completely drained from his words now and it broke my heart to see my brother all but broken on the floor. "I can't fight this anymore, Lizzie. I can't and I won't. If you need to put yourself through the pain of letting him back into your life, I won't stop you. Just don't expect me to even try caring about either of them at all. I wrote them both off years ago. You are my family. You, Madeline and now Gordo and Miranda. That's all I need and it's all I'm going to bother with."

"Matt. . .thanks." To be honest I was a little surprised that he was letting it go at that and not threatening to leave my life if I let our parents back in. I had planned on having to fight him to reach this point and I would have preferred that to seeing him laying down and not even putting up any resistance at all. "You know that if you had pressed the issue and made me choose that mom and dad would have been left in the cold, right?"

"Yeah, about that. I'm sorry for most of what I said last night. It was wrong of me to make you choose between them and me. You can thank Miranda for that revelation by the way." He smiled at me and it warmed me. The emotion that had drained from his voice was very much still in his eyes and I was even glad to see his barely controlled resentment for our parents.

"I'll make sure to do that." I returned his smile and wiped the tears off his face with my hand in a comforting gesture. "Look, I won't call dad until after I talk to mom and if she doesn't think it would go very well to have them both here then I won't invite dad. He might have helped bring us into this world, but you're right, he doesn't deserve to be apart of the lives we've created for each other. I just want to give him a chance to change that though."

"Lizzie, it's your wedding day. Make sure you invite whoever you need to be there to make it the best possible day, even if that is both of our parents."

"Little bro, thanks again. I know this isn't easy on you and I really appreciate it." I gave my brother a long and tight hug, my emotions pulsing excitedly through me.

"Yeah well, I figure if I do this I can count it as my wedding present and save myself some cash." I playfully slapped his arm as he started laughing and stood up. I took his offered hand and let him pull me off the floor.

"You just keep dreaming, I'm expecting something great from the best man, and no adding your name on the card to what Miranda gets either." I joked back with him. "Now, I have to get ready for work and go, you sure you're okay with me calling mom and maybe dad?"

"As okay as I can be, but I won't make any big scenes if that's what you're worried about."

"I'm more worried about dad having too much to drink and telling me about the kind of girl that gets pregnant before she's married again. I really don't see him surviving another run in with my personal protector. You did send him to the emergency room, although I'm sure that had more to do with mom over reacting than him actually feeling pain from his broken ribs, as drunk as he was."

"Well, let's just hope that he has changed. I wouldn't mind letting go of my anger, I still don't ever want to have them as a part in my life, but being angry all the time is really only good for writing songs. Otherwise, being all pissed off and angsty is over rated." I shared my brother's soft laughter as I walked down the hall to my bedroom to find my way to the shower eventually.

"Maybe this will actually work out." I said to myself. "Maybe."

A/N-I just want to thank each and everyone of you that has reviewed and let me know how much you are enjoying this story, either for the first time or for a second. Thank you for taking the time to not only read what I write, but to also let me know what you think of it. This is CH.17 of 19. The rest will be posted by this weekend, well it should be at least. Thanks again to you all.


	18. Look At Where We're Going

Madeline

Chapter Eighteen -

Miranda

Okay, I don't even know where to begin going through all the thoughts running laps in my head. In no time at all everything about my life has been turned completely upside down over Matt again. Last time this happened I was left alone for six years, hoping that he would come back someday and save me from being alone. But now here we were, about to move in together, well in the same house anyway, plus I've got Lizzie back in my life along with her and Gordo's adorable little girl, Madeline. I can know one thing for sure, I'll never have to worry about being alone ever again.

Of course, that didn't bother me at all, I hated falling asleep in an empty apartment every night. I had even thought of moving back in with my parents after college, but wanted to give them the time alone my dad had always joked they would get when I was finally moving on with my own life. So I've been living alone in this apartment, dreading going home every night for over a year and I had no qualms with telling it goodbye forever. In fact, telling that part of life goodbye was sounding better and better.

I could tell there was something really bothering Matt as we packed up some of my stuff. He hadn't hardly said a word after showing up at my door an hour before. Even despite the fact that it had been almost midnight, there was something in his eyes that gave him away. I knew that look though and it was one I hated. He was angry over something involving his parents, so I figured he'd tell me when he was ready to say it all out loud and as we stood there filling boxes he finally spoke.

"You're probably waiting for me to tell you why I walked over here at midnight, huh?"

"Well, I have to admit being a little curious. What's up?" I took his hand and led him to the couch where we sat down. I sat next to him with my legs crossed so I was facing his side.

Matt took a deep breath and slowly blew it out before telling me what was bothering him. "Lizzie told me tonight that she was thinking about calling our parents and inviting them to the wedding." He let the words hang in the air as if they were the worst things anyone could have said.

"Okay, you aren't going to like this very much, but let me finish before you say anything." I looked him in the eyes and took a steadying breathe of my own. This was so not going to be easy, but I had been preparing for it since Lizzie told me what she was planning on doing. "I know that what your dad did to Lizzie and you was just wrong, there's no way around it, but don't you think it's time to let it go? I'm not asking you to just pretend it didn't happen, but I hate seeing the hatred you hold for them in your eyes every time either of your parents are brought up. The things your dad said that night left a scar on you that will always be there, but you have to let the cut heal up eventually, Matt. I love you and this isn't easy to tell you cause I'm honestly worried you'll get mad and never talk to me again, but I can't let you live with this pain anymore. I need you to let it go sweetie." I took his face in my hands and looked him full in the face. "Can you at least just try to let the past be the past? For me?" I leaned in and kissed his lips softly, grateful when I felt him returning the kiss.

"I. . .I'm sorry." He whispered before kissing me.

"Don't be sorry, I understand everything. I just hate to see you still hurting like it all happened yesterday. I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to live through that once, I don't want you living through it everyday anymore."

"I'll try okay? I won't forgive them ever and I'll never let them be a part of my life again, but I'll try to let it all go. For you."

"Thanks." I smiled at him before kissing his soft lips again, enjoying the warmth against mine as he deepened the kiss with running his tongue against my lip in between his. I stretched my legs out in his lap and laid back with him moving on top of me on the couch. It didn't take long before we were lost in a world where just the two of us existed and our kisses were our oxygen, keeping us alive.

After a while Matt broke our kisses and shifted into the little space between me and the back of the couch. He rested his head on my shoulder and I soon felt the warmth of tears on my skin. "You okay?" I asked him before starting to run my fingers through his hair and playing with it.

"Yeah, I think I'm just letting some of the pain out."

"Let as much out as you need to. We can lay here all night if you need to. I'm not going anywhere." I turned on my side so I was facing him and kissed his forehead before smiling at him. I hugged him and we laid there as he cried silently, letting years of anger and pain finally be released. Eventually he fell asleep in my arms. I laid where I was, still fingering his hair and enjoying the warmth coming off of him. I laid there that night just thinking about how much the boy in my arms had dealt with and promised myself that he would experience as little pain as possible from now on. Things were going great for him, Gordo was helping him get things moving with his music and he was getting so excited as the days counted down to when I was moving in. I knew that his parents popping into the picture now was the last thing he needed or wanted, but I hoped with everything in me that Lizzie was right in thinking they had changed. "I won't let him hurt you again, Matt. Not now, or ever."

I wasn't really sure how the whole night passed me by, but soon the room around me and Matt was beginning to brighten with the rising of the sun. I knew Lizzie would be leaving for work in a few hours and Matt needed to get home for Madeline so I reluctantly kissed his lips to wake him up.

"Now that's why I'm going to find a way around sleeping in separate rooms." He said as he woke with a smile. "That definitely beats having to hear my alarm clock." I rolled my eyes and stood up, stretching a night spent sharing a couch out of my muscles.

"Okay, next time we move to a bed before you fall asleep. That was anything but comfortable."

"I didn't mind it so much, as long as I wake up seeing you, I think I could sleep anywhere though." He said as he stood and stretched too, although I was soon enjoying watching him rather than actually doing any stretching myself.

"Yeah, well you weren't hanging half way off the stupid couch all night." I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around him, sharing a yawn after he started one. "But, it was worth it just to watch you stretch. You're too sexy."

"You should see me naked." I slapped his chest in response to his joke.

"I have McGuire, was I supposed to be impressed?" I joked back.

"Ha! I know you were amazed by the sight of me in all my glory!"

"Wow, all your glory, huh? I think you need to leave now before you completely ruin the beautiful image of you stretching from my mind by saying anything else stupid." I pulled away from him and started heading for my bedroom. Dawn was still a little earlier than I cared to be awake. Granted my alarm was set to go off forty minutes from now, but that was forty minutes I planned on being in bed for.

"I do need to get back. I never called Lizzie last night to tell her I was okay so she's probably been up all night checking my room and waiting for me to get home. Plus she'll be leaving soon and Mads needs her uncle Matt." He grabbed my hand and pulled me back into another hug and a few more kisses. "Thanks for everything you said last night and don't ever worry about me hating you for telling me what's on your heart. You were right, I need to let it go and I'll try. I love you, you know that?"

"I had my suspicions." I smiled and kissed him one last time before pulling away again. "I love you too, now get going so I can get a good half hour of sleep in a bed." I stood there and watched until the door had closed behind him and then I went and laid down. I turned off my alarm a minute before it went off and figured I'd call in sick and spend the day with Matt. Besides I did need to start taking some of my stuff over there, so I could kill two birds with one stone. My mind made up, I hugged my pillow and let sleep finally take me from conscience.

VvVvV

I looked at my clock and tried to figure out what was going on, whatever had woke me up was not the sound I was used to my alarm making. Plus, I knew I never had it set for ten twenty three. I sat up straight in bed as I realized two things at the same time. One, the sound was the phone ringing, not my clock, and two I was still asleep after ten. I grabbed the phone from it's charger next to my bed and answered it.

"Hello?"

"Miranda? Hey, are feeling okay? It's after ten, are you coming in today?" As Phil talked, I remembered the previous night and my plans to skip out on work rushed back into my head.

"Oh, well actually I had meant to call in and let you know I wouldn't be coming in today. Unless you need me for something. . ."

"No, no, it's fine. Me and Jennifer can handle everything for one day I think. You sound exhausted though. Make sure you get some sleep and I'll see you tomorrow okay?"

I smiled into the receiver. "Okay, if you're sure. I'm feeling okay, I was just needing to get some stuff done with moving and. . ." I was cut off by laughter from the man on the other end.

"Miranda, you aren't supposed to tell your boss when you skip out for a day." He laughed a little more before continuing. "Just get some rest and enjoy a nice easy day with that Matt kid and I'll pretend you at least pretended to sound sick on the phone, deal?"

"Sounds good to me. Thanks Phil, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye."

"Bye. Oh, if you see your parents send them a hello from me will ya?"

"Sure will. Bye." I hung up my phone then and laid back down under the covers, not really ready to face the day yet. Now that I thought about it, I was feeling pretty exhausted so I took advantage of a day with nothing to do and fell back asleep after setting my alarm for noon. That would still leave me with a whole afternoon to move a few things, swing by my parents house and let them know I was moving, and find a few hours to enjoy having Matt back in my life.

A/N-Only one more chapter to go. I can see why I started a sequel to this story. I really have enjoyed reading through it again and reposting it. Thanks many times over to everyone who has reviewed and encouraged me to continue reposting and working on my stories again. It means so much to me that so many were still interested.

Read. Review. Enjoy

Hacen


	19. Tell Me What Can I Say

Madeline

Chapter Nineteen - Tell Me What Can I Say

Matt

I stood in the door way of my niece's bedroom and watched her small chest rise and fall with soft breathing as she slept. Lizzie had left a good hour ago and I had not moved from where I was at that moment. There were so many uncertainties in my mind that I was having trouble dealing with. I had come far in my life over the past twelve or so hours and I still hadn't got it all sorted out in my mind.

Yesterday I had seemed content living with the anger I had held for my parents for five years and really saw no reason for that to change. But after spending last night talking with Miranda and seeing how much I was hurting her and my sister, I knew it was time to move on. My father's words that night had destroyed the life we knew, but I had let them control the new life I had made with Lizzie and Madeline. I had survived on them when there was no food and I had thrived on them for inspiration when writing lyrics. Pain like I held inside from my father was useful at times, but in the end it left you nothing else unless you were able to move past it, and now it was that time for me.

"I'll never forgive him but I can learn to not hate him." I said aloud.

"You're not supposed to hate people uncle Matt. Remember? You and mommy told me that." I jumped a little when Madeline spoke from her bed. I had not noticed her open eyes staring at me while I had been lost in thought.

"You're right Mads. I guess I need to listen to my own words, huh?" The little girl nodded her head, even though I had not been seeking an actual answer. "Why don't we surprise daddy today with a visit? I know he's been missing his little girl and I know she's been missing him."

"Yay!" She threw her blanket to the floor as she jumped out of bed and ran to hug me. "Well, come on. We haven't got all day, buddy!" She said excitedly, holding her arms over her head so I could get my big shirt off of her and get her dressed for the day. I smiled down at her before gently pulling the shirt over her head.

"I think we'd better get you a bath too Mads, but I admire your spirit." She crossed her arms over her chest and made a pouting face. "Don't even girlie, get to the bathroom and I'll grab you some clothes." After she had stomped noisily off down the hall, I walked over to her dresser but was distracted by a drawing on top of it. The words 'my family' were written neatly across the top but underneath them was three stick figures drawn with crayon. I didn't need the writing underneath to tell me who the three figures were. This had been my favorite drawing of Madeline's from before we'd moved. Before her family had consisted of more than Madeline, Mommy, and Uncle Matt.

"Uncle Matt!" Madeline's voice broke my reverie as it echoed down the hall from the bathroom.

"I'm coming, Mads." I put the picture down with a smile. For the first time since moving back to Hillridge, I could honestly say that I was happy. Yeah, everything was changing and I was no longer the only person in Madeline's life besides Lizzie, but that did not mean I was not still in it at all. Gordo was the best kind of father for my niece and he was the best kind of husband, or soon to be, for my sister. I knew they were safe with him. I had gotten used to being Lizzie's protector, the one she turned to when she needed to cry or needed to scream about something and vent some anger. I had been there through what was easily the hardest years that our life had ever seen and would hopefully ever see.

I walked out of the bedroom and down the hall to the bathroom. Madeline was standing in the middle of the room with her arms crossed, tapping her foot impatiently and giving me a look that was straight from Lizzie's face. "I thought I said we didn't have all day."

With a few tears clouding my eyes I started to laugh as I bent down and took the little girl in my arms for a tight hug. "You know what Mads, everything's going to be okay. In fact, it's going to be great once we all get through this moving in and wedding stuff. And Grandma and Grandpa have come and gone." I muttered the last so she couldn't understand what I said.

"Yeah, I know." She replied with a smile before kissing my cheek. "But don't forget about daddy." I smiled against more tears when she whispered the last in my ear, tears of happiness. I was ready for change, especially if it meant being with Miranda. As I sat there with my niece, waiting for the bathtub to fill, I remembered a promise I had made to Lizzie when we'd first moved here.

VvFlashbackvV

"You're still angry at them for everything aren't you?" She knew the answer, we'd had this conversation just before moving when mom had called to tell us to drive safely and to call when we got into town.

"I always will, Lizzie. They destroyed our lives and put us through that bullshit just to end up divorcing each other the minute you and I are out of the house? How can I ever not hold them in contempt. I really hate them for everything they put you through over the pregnancy and when you decided to keep her. I'll never forgive dad screaming that you had made the biggest mistake of your life and that you were on your own. Never." My gaze was penetrating her eyes as she stared back into mine.

"Matt, I've let it go. Why can't you?" She sighed and looked away blinking away tears before they could fall. "They've really tried these last few years to make up for everything, even dad. You can't stay mad at them forever."

"I can try." We settled into a very uncomfortable silence before Lizzie grabbed a blanket from a box and headed to what had been designated her room.

"Goodnight, Matt. I love you."

"I love you to, sis." I waited until she disappeared from view and added under my breath, "If I can somehow fix everything with Miranda, then I'll try to forgive them, I'll try."

VvEndvV

Well, now it was time to try. It was all I had promised myself and it was all I was going to do. I could let this go and I could possibly even eventually forgive mom, but I knew one thing for sure: I had all the family I needed with me at the moment. Lizzie, Gordo, Madeline, and Miranda where more than enough for me. They were my family, my life, my world, and there was no one worth destroying that world over because I could not let go of my anger. My father had destroy my life once, but I would never let it happen again.

A/N- And so it ends. I know it seems like there's something missing, but for this story all I set out to do was show Matt coming around, It was an experiment in writing for me really, first person is probably the hardest for me to write well. There was originally a sequel, but I don't know if I'll repost it or work on it, I think this has reached a point where I am content with. It's like a movie, it ends when the story is done, not when their lives are over. I could go on into more detail, but I really like just leaving it open ended. This is a real-life happy ending, more bittersweet than anything else. Things will never be the same and can never be fixed, but we all have to find the place where we decide to live the rest of our lives instead of the past. That was what I set out to do for Matt's character, and that is what I accomplished.

Many thanks to all who read, and extra to those who reviewed too.

Hacen


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